Before ya'll jump on me, this is just my OPINION to everyone who questions why black women give so much heat to black men dating outside their race but not to black women when they do the same:
I think the reason most black women take issue with black men dating outside their race is b/c it's been going on for soooooo long. Some black men even go through the trouble of downing black women in the process just to justify why he's dating an "other". I.E...black women have too much attitude, no class, ghetto, etc.
Also, for so long...a black man will get a little money in his pocket, and instead of helping bring a sista up, he'll run out the first chance he gets and picks up a white trophy wife b/c he sees them as being more classy and his ticket into being accepted. Just look at the number of black male celebs and athletes out here who are married to an "other". I can't even think of how many (there's some, but not many) famous black women are married to one themselves.
It's just baffeling how many black men are steady looking for something "exotic" or different, not out of curiosity, but b/c he perceives it as being better. I think that's what black women have a problem with.
When it's a black woman dating outside her race, she doesn't catch as much heat from other black women b/c it's like, "dang...someone out there still wants us." There was an episode of Tyra where she had a variety of 8 men (2 each of black, white, hispanic, and asian) who were sharing their views about 4 women of different races (black, hispanic, white, and asian) regarding ***, dating, and relationships. There was 1 part in the show where the men were asked to stand behind their fantasy woman...(((NO ONE))) stood behind the beautiful black sista...NOT EVEN THE 2 BLACK MEN WHO WERE A PART OF THE GROUP!!!!!! 1 black stood behind the white woman and the other was behind the hispanic. Then when asked to stand behind the woman they would married, 1 of the black men came and stood behind the black woman. None of the other races saw the black woman as a fantasy or as someone they would married...and she was VERY beautiful. And that's the feeling most black women get when they see a black man outside their race. So when an “other” steps to us, it’s like…“Ok…we’re still wanted.”
I'm not saying that all black men are like that nor am I bashing them...just giving my opinion of why I think it's so one-sided sometimes when it comes to interracial dating. I'm all for interracial dating and would do it myself if I found someone I was attracted to, b/c you never know what you could be missing out on when you discriminate. But I take issue when people down their own or view them as “less than” to justify why they're dating outside their race.