: Here's an essay that MediaTakeOut.om got its hands on. It was written by soul singer Jill Scott:
My new friend is handsome, African-American, intelligent and seemingly wealthy. He is an athlete, loves his momma, and is happily married to a White woman. I admit when I saw his wedding ring, I privately hoped. But something in me just knew he didn't marry a sister. Although my guess hit the mark, when my friend told me his wife was indeed Caucasian, I felt my spirit...wince. I didn't immediately understand it. My face read happy for you. My body showed no reaction to my inner pinch, but the sting was there, quiet like a mosquito under a summer dress.We’re gonna leave this one alone . . .Was I jealous? Did the reality of his relationship somehow diminish his soul's credibility? The answer is not simple. One could easily dispel the wince as racist or separatist, but that's not how I was brought up. I was reared in a Jehovah's Witness household. I was taught that every man should be judged by his deeds and not his color, and I firmly stand where my grandmother left me. African people worldwide are known to be welcoming and open-minded. We share our culture sometimes to our own peril and most of us love the very notion of love. My position is that for women of color, this very common "wince" has solely to do with the African story in America.
When our people were enslaved, "Massa" placed his Caucasian woman on a pedestal. She was spoiled, revered and angelic, while the Black slave woman was overworked, beaten, raped and farmed out like cattle to be mated. She was nothing and neither was our Black man. As slavery died for the greater good of America, and the movement for equality sputtered to life, the White woman was on the cover of every American magazine. She was the dazzling jewel on every movie screen, the glory of every commercial and television show. She was unequivocally the standard of beauty for this country, firmly unattainable to anyone not of her race. We daughters of the dust were seen as ugly, nappy mammies, good for day work and unwanted children, while our men were thought to be thieving, sex-hungry animals with limited brain capacity.
We reflect on this awful past and recall that if a Black man even looked at a White woman, he would have been lynched, beaten, jailed or shot to death. In the midst of this, Black women and Black men struggled together, mourned together, starved together, braved the hoses and vicious police dogs and died untimely on southern back roads together. These harsh truths lead to what we really feel when we see a seemingly together brother with a Caucasian woman and their children. That feeling is betrayed. While we exert efforts to raise our sons and daughters to appreciate themselves and respect others, most of us end up doing this important work alone, with no fathers or like representatives, limited financial support (often court-enforced) and, on top of everything else, an empty bed. It's frustrating and it hurts!
Our minds do understand that people of all races find genuine love in many places. We dig that the world is full of amazing options. But underneath, there is a bite, no matter the ointment, that has yet to stop burning. Some may find these thoughts to be hurtful. That is not my intent. I'm just sayin'.
I think that love is love, BUT I am bothered by it because it seems like with the dudes I know, they in it because they cant handle black women. Any man that cant handle any woman is a punk. And statements like that to me cry that you a punk as a man and that white women are weak, docile, and easily controllable. That bothers me soooo much. Be with a person because you truly love them and I couldnt be happier. But choosing to be with someone because they are an "easy" race to deal with really pisses me off. Get your balls up and man up already!
She is speaking outloud what a lot of intellgent, respectable BLACK women are thinking. There are great black women out here being overlooked because of the ghetto hoe's tarnishing our images and because of the white chicks who.btw, have to SAME motives and agendas as the so-called black gold-digger-girl. Black women are at the bottem of the totem pole. I am black woman, so I say that being HONEST and NOT disrespectful. Just sayin"...
I understand where she's coming from. Part of what she's saying is factual, and the rest is simply her opinion. I'd never knock Jill for that. She was bold enough to publish her feelings, which is courageous, in and of itself. Conversely, it's your right to disagree with her, and I'd also never knock anyone from doing that. It's healthy debate. Personally, I think you're going to love, whomever you're going to love. Go 'head, Jill!
@Adidas09 Why go off on the deep end and compare such with the scum of the earth black prostitutes & such. I know it's hard for you imagine a mixed heterosexual relationship where there love, respect, admiration and dignity where none of that disgusting ghetto-gagger crap takes place. That's no difference then these same type of low-life females being with a Black thug who engage in the same type activities. There is a difference between a respectable, educated, loving couple in a marriage regardless of color and the small-minded disgusting low life(s) that you are only aware of. smh @nonsense
Poor Jill. Every black man is not for every black woman, and every black woman is not for every black man. The problem is a lot of black women refuse to date outside the race, and while that is their option, it limits their mate potential. Don't fear the unknown and step outside your comfort zone sisters, then maybe you'll find the love you've been missing.
While I can appreciate what Jill has to say, she sounds the older black folks who are stuck on a plantation. Who cares when we have a large number of Black men that are either gay, on the DL, in prison, have no respect for themselves let alone women and live for the thug life & rap music. Like minds attract each other. Well, Jill how did your so-called Black Bro of a husband work for you? Get real! I'm over the black love fantasy! I'm Color-blind, with no hangups & looking for quality of character & achievements in a man. It's called progression Jill & freeing one's soul & mind. Time 2 move on
I'm Puertorican but I have to say I feel Jill Scott on that. I have a lot of respect for African American history. Having said that, I think Black women have to worry about being the best they can be as individuals and expand their minds as there is a whole world out there, a world w/ no limits and no limits as who they could be dating. This was touching though.
Black women need to stop worrying about who random strangers are dating. IT is 2010 and we can date whoever we want. --------------------------------------------
alfreda... I believe things are moving in that direction.... BUT I, for one, feel a camaraderie with my fellow black man and black woman. I still have and hope for a better sense of community, black love, black pride, etc.
And it is that attachment that produces that sting. Not an outrage or something that will prevent me from living my life... just a sting.
I agree with Jill Scott. To see any black man with a white woman is a betrayal. Someone on here said true love has no color...!!? I agree but most blacks don't know what love is. Love is the struggle to people share together that takes a life time to endure. It is not a good sexual mate who is submissive to the extent where her man does whatever he wants to her and anyone else as long as the bank account is fat. Honestly, what white girl wants the stigma of being with a black man and black kids unless there's lots of money involved or they can't find a rich white man to take of them?
Its amazing to me how all these black people want us to forget about slavery. lol. Are you serious? That was a major part of black American history. You think the Jews will ever let us forget about the holocaust? Hell no. So why is blacks and whites trying to make blacks forget about our history. Pretty or not its OUR history. You should NEVER forget your history. Besides slavery isnt even a life time removed. My great aunt still tells me about stories of living in a slave house and how her mother was a slave. You dumb asses. NEVER FORGET YOUR HISTORY BECAUSE IF YOU DO ITS BOUND TO BE REPEATED
Smh....I'm so sick of this argument. Personally I prefer black women(I'm African American). But it doesn't 'burn my soul' to see interracial couples. Love is love and it knows no color. If one truly applied that logic to ALL relationships, there shouldn't be a 'sting'. I don't care how 'intelligently' she put it, the fact that many of our black women feel this way is f*cked up.
And f*ucked-up pie is still f*cked-up pie no matter what way you slice it.
As a black male, I understand where she's coming from. In a sense, at times, it's almost like sleeping with the enemy's daughter in the mind's of some black women, and even black men. My experience with White people have been good and bad, but I know my history. I sometimes wish a white person can feel what a Black American feel sometimes, when they roll their eyes at us, turn us down for jobs or police brutality, but I will be wrong. I feel sometimes that white people got a easy ride and black folks didnt, so I have a little resentment, but my resent is enough not to date white anything.
Yall idiots running around talking about "that was the past and we need to move on". Dont you people see the negative effects that slavery has on our people. But with the negative effects there are a lot of positive ones. Like those that choose to appreciate what our forefathers fought for to give us the blessings we have today. Like an education and the right to live and thrive. Like them black men who become successful but then oh choose to marry the very ones who are his oppressors. NEVER MARRY YOUR ENEMY. DUMMIES.
Slavery and Racial Segregation ended years ago so why do people want to keep the shackles on their feet when they're not locked? Listen racism exists true enough but it comes from all sides not just white people. I see it on MTO all the time and unless you are over 100 years old, YOU WERE NOT A SLAVE It's time to grow out of the old "conventional" way of thinking and pave a new path into the future. As long as you continue to think "Love" has a color then you continue to limit yourself. Keep an open mind and not a closed heart.
ugh.....this bitch needs to chill the f*ck out.
No wonder black men think they're the [EXPLETIVE], white chicks swoon over them, while black chicks whine and cry about why none of them want to be with them!
JEEZ WOMAN THIS IS 2010! INTERRACIAL RELATIONSHIPS ARE TAKING OVER!
I wonder if she hurts when she sees products of IR relationships, like Halle Berry, Tiger Woods (LOL)....her OWN PRESIDENT!?!?! You can call him black all ya want, but he's a swirly! LOL
-The Cablinasian (:
DO JILL NOTICE THAT ITS 2010 NOT 1934 ITS A FREE COUNTRY GET OVER IT AND LIVE WITH IT.....IM TIRED OF HEARING ALL THIS COMPLAINING AND BITCHING WHEN U SEE A BROTHA WITH ANOTHER ETHNICITY GET OVER IT ITS GONNA HAPPEN..........SHE AND SOME OF YAH ON HERE SOUND SIMILAR TO THE (BLACK VERSION) OF THE K.K.K TO ME WITH ALL THIS HATRED TOWARDS WHITE WOMEN.
It's funny I just wrote a paper about interracial dating. SMH @ a lot of you making generalizations. Although most people can sympathize with what Jill is saying, hell I can and I am a product of IR dating. But at the same time America, Black America will NOT be able to move on from the wrong that whites have done if we keep blaming everything on them.
I guess many people don't see that. The more we let things like that DIVIDE our race the more WE will not succeed as a whole. Only WE can do better for ourselves and for our future.
And you know u always see a white girl riding for a black man if he's on drugs and she is too. I say sisters let the [EXPLETIVE] be. Get your self right with the lord because the [EXPLETIVE] that we're enduring on earth is temporary, heaven is forever. Be content that u are alone because these white girls have to share these men but they don't care. [EXPLETIVE] aren't faithful to them either. Don't compromise ur standards just to have a man. Like Deelicious said, be with a [EXPLETIVE] with money or don't be with noone, because a [EXPLETIVE] broke or rich delivers the same issues, infedilty regardless.
The Sad thing is that educated people such as Jill Scott are ignorant to the reality, that this is what some many people died for when fighting for civil rights. THE FREEDOM TO BE FREE! regardless what prefrence when we choose a lover! it is 2010 BLACK,WHITE,CHINESE we are Fn E Q U A L! so jill scott is a BIGOT plain and simple
@ChasityLove
Speak child. Love is the struggle. Love is being there for your little black boys and little black girls. Not raising Beckys kids. Fu(K that our black boys need our black men to give back to them. Why give to a community that doesnt need it. Especially when you didnt even come from THAT community. They killing our black boys left and right and the best thing you house Nig gers can do is marry their sisters and daughters? GTFOH.
Who cares! If a white woman is dumb enough to marry a black man let her! Its not going to last, he's not going to be faithful, and he's not going to raise the children which he is so quick to create! You black women really need to learn how to be soft, feminine and lady like and not sneaker wearing, gum cracking hood rats then you find a successful man of any color!
CDEXO8 U seem like an college educated brother but u r still confused. Slavery is practiced on a whole new level. U don't have to be physically restrained to be oppressed. Dude the products of slavery is the mentality u and most blacks express everyday. Ur comments prove that u have a slave mentality. All [EXPLETIVE] say slavery ended long ago.
I feel like we didnt ask to be brought here to America. A lot of black men, and a few women, are brainwashed, by white society, to think that white women look better. To me, our community cant afford to have all the good men leave out and marry out, that leaves unwed mothers and unreared kids that grow up and rob people and end up in jail. The black family need unity and a black man and black woman period to survive in America. We have real enemies here that have oppressed and brainwased us. Im not a racist, but its the truth. Love is love, but think about what I said..........
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@ emmettmays85, hey Sexy - missed YOU!!! MMMWAH =P
@ NikkiLaFleur, I feel you. But the problem with that is, that the benefits of slavery are still being reaped by many whites - they got several hundred years of free labor off our backs, and it wasn't that long ago. Also, they are still doing many things to hurt the black communities and break up the family unit, which is their only way of overcoming & manipulating us. Many of their tactics have worked and still working...
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Im a single mom. Some days i love it and some days i hate. But whats so cool is I have friends that support me and mine. My girlfriend (who is married), her husband and i get together and tutor our children together. And sometimes when I look around see the progress we are making with our children, i see why they say "It takes a village to raise a child". We need our black men. White women dont. Our black boys need our black men. If everyone would stop being so selfish and only worrying about themselves then maybe our communities wouldnt be what they are today.
angelaheiressnyc hey baby , yeah u are right i notice when dealing with black and white relationships, according to hypocrite bitches on here a black women and white man marry out of love , but a black that marries a white women , oh he is self hating, he hate his mother (i hate that bullshit rant) or he ashamed of his blackness, a whole bunch of [EXPLETIVE] that is never thrown up at a black women who is with a white man
Jill has some amazing opinions that are to me, True. From the history of treatment of black women til today how they are treated. My opininon, some are truely degrading themselves for attention. We all have a choice but for blackman to be with a white woman, he feels that he's arrived and not only being with a white person but to be with her and talk negatively about blackwomen your basically including your mother, grandmother and every black woman that went throught hell to raise you.
I agree what she is saying and why she's saying it. I kind of wince when i see it too. I'm from Washington state, and there they consider white women "top notch" cause they got money to trick off and all of that. That i don't like. But if a black man really loves his white woman and isn't trying to use her to be something he could never be then it's love and you have to respect that.
ME TOO GIRL. JILL YOU ARE AN OLD SOUL. BLACK WOMEN DID EVERYTHING POSSIBLE TO SAVE OUR BLACK MEN SO THEY COULD SURVIVE FROM SLAVERY TILL NOW, AND THIS IS HOW THEY REPAY ALL OF OUR EFFORTS! WE WORKED WHEN THEY COULD NOT, WE BROKE OUR BACKS AND PUT UP WITH ALL OF THE BULL FROM THE WHITE RACE JUST SO OUR SONS COULD MAKE IT. IT'S JUST TOO MUCH TO WRITE AND TO MUCH TO TAKE. SO BLACK MALES DO YOU........GOD IS WATCHING!!!
@Bezsenny
Your completely right and I understand that. But I just feel as if too many people use slavery as an excuse. But then again that mentality is learned at home, so many children don't get the chance to think otherwise. But in order to do better for ourselves, people have to let that mentality go and move forward instead of staying in the past. It's obviously doing nothing for our race.
Every valid point that was made in this thread I understand. But at the same time it's that mentality that's not getting us anywhere
@emmettmays85: exactly! I mean,if you're going to be so against IR relationships/procreation then be an equal opportunity discriminator because it's pretty hypocrite for a bw to allegedly be so "hurt" or up in arms whenever it involves a bw/ww but when it's the other way around? It's all good & feels somewhat validated I guess? Please!
I feel where Jill is coming from. I think every black women gets the feeling in her body. Its almost a reflex. Perhaps its an innate feeling of wanting to preserve the race and wanting to do it with a successful black man. However, black men are doing this because they know how jealous we black women are. Ignore them. Stop giving black men and white women power. Hyping them up. We call ourselves strong black women then act like it Dammit. While your at it, open your mind up to dating non black men. Maybe some of the bitterness will dissapate.
Why is it that negroes who disagreee with IR relationships always have to bring up things that happen in slavery times??? Muhfukkas, this ain't slavery times, and you don't know any slaves. I'm not saying forget your history, but F*CK!!!!!! Can you just give me a better reason than that for disagreeing with it. White folks ain't givin' a f*ck about you still being butt-hurt over some terrible things that have happened to our people so long ago. Stop lumping everyday people with those that did these things. And don't reply because I won't respond, you'll be wasting your time.
I agree with QueenieE to the FULLEST! You can put lipstick on a pig, but its still a pig. Make your words elegant but it's still racism. I have been in love with black women since day one, usually more than my own Latina sisters. I have a son with a beautiful black woman and the love we shared was one of the most powerful things I have ever felt. My soul winces when I read this heifer make it seem our love wasn't better than any love I could've had with my own or my girl with hers... This is Bullshit... My love will not take the blame for the past or for anyone!
Jill Scott shut ya jelous azz up u just haten cuz u cant get a successful black man. Yall black women always puttin black men down yall think theres not alot of successful black men i bet theres more successful black men den there is successful black women & dats bcuz a black man has a white women there 2 to support him 100%.
Black women it is imperative that you get a good education before you even consider having children. Live for today and tomorrow because there is nothing you can do about the way other adults live their lives. Concentrate on yourselves first. Take care of your health and stay out of those trifling clubs filled with trifling men who only want to party and shrink from responsibility. Ours sons are not graduating from school. They are going to prison and come out worst than they went in.
Research on IR relationships??? LOL
You can't generalize it. It's not like it's a bad thing either, just look at all the great offspring that has come from IR relationships!
-Halle Berry -BARACK OBAMA (yup...he's MIXED) -Tiger Woods (aside from the scandal) -Jimi Hendrix -W.E.B Dubois -Fredrick Douglas -Henry Oswanna Tanne -Alexandre Dumas -Alicia Keys -Lenny Kravitz
and MANY MORE.....
[link to external website removed]
As far as I see it, IT'S ALL GOOD! lol
Furthermore, my intelligence and integrity as a black man is insulted when our race(black men and women), feel that any black person involved in an IR 'sold-out' or 'betrayed' their race. Isn't that the same kind of stereotyping and categorizing that we've become so angry at white people for doing? Yes, there are black men and women who date outside their race for less than honorable reasons, but you shouldn't let a few bad apples spoil the bunch.
Read about slavery, learn how it was accomplished and what they did to strip the slaves of their culture and their sense of family, pride, and love. Read about how they lived and viewed life. Analyze your life, not the physical, but evaluate the mental processes that you exercise to solve problems choose mates and view family and culture. Then find out if correlates with the forced behaviors of slaves.
It make me sick how black men have a problem with what jill said when its the truth. But doing the jim crow year. When the white man were telling black men boy you will never be sh!t. It was black women standing up saying the devil is a liar. Baby you can be what ever you want to be. Black men needed black women then. Yall some dumb ass men.
It is good to remember the past, but living in history in the present will only make you bitter and depressed. Jill Scott is only making us appear weeping and moaning and I am so finished with that mentality. We don't own black men so let them do what they want so long as they are responsible. I just want them to grow up and take responsibility for the children they bring into this world.
@SaintJames What other reason do you need as to why we feel this way? Slavery wasnt enough????? Really?
And YES the south is still very much separated. Yall runnin around acting like separation doesnt exist and that white folks want the best for our black boys. lol.
PLEASE OPEN A BOOK AND THEN TAKE A TRIP SOMEWHERE BESIDES YOUR BACKYARD.
I'm really laughing at some of you bw on here! If you haven't noticed the bm that are successful and about something besides hood rat ways want a CLASSY and ELEGANT woman, not a chick that would fight at the drop of a hat! You bw really need to learn some manners and have some goals and aspirations because becoming a video vixen on a damn "model". Get an education and some sophistication and you get a man worth something!
Oh and I agree with SaintJames about living in the past. Yes our ancestors did suffer horrible times during slavery but we are so far past that now. It really irritates me when I hear a black person rant and rave continuously about the WM and how everything is his fault. Is this what Dr. King fought for? I don't think so. Most of us no longer live in segregation, I have white friends who I care about. It's time for some of us to let go of that grip we have on the past!
Black women for the most part do not care about ww bm. Its only when its thrown in our face in a negative way to make us feel inferior is when we have the issue. Stop comparing us. It is true. I post on non black blogs, I never hear other races tearing down their women. What's really good black men? Do you need attention? Seems as if you all are acting out. As hard as you may try. I'm really tired of these threads deemed to make black women look desperate, lonely, pathetic, and bitter.
In these days anyone can acquire wealth, but does that mean u r truly free? You pay off your house u still owe the goverment money, if u don't pay ur taxes, the state has the authority to sell ur house to someone else for the cost of back taxes. So is ownership a realization in America? What about ur car? If you don't pay your taxes u can't drive. It's better to enslave an entire country then a specific race, because the only war to be fought is against the government? But who's "foolish" enough to start a revolt?
A lot of brothers can't handle this essay by Jill,cause they can't handle the TRUTH
They are never for holding the community together,but dividing it.Even when they have MIXED kids they are never around for them,look at the clebrities,Alicia Keys,Halle berry,Barrack Obama,all grew up without their BLACK fathers.
I wonder really if certain black men,will ever GROW up,and face up to their RESPONSIBILITIES
Another thing..even though what Jill wrote was powerful..why is she so concerned about bm dating/marrying outside their race if she's in a relationship? Isn't she happy? Her family is all that should matter to her @ the time & how does she feel about the POTUS? He's a product of a biracial union..just saying
@CDEX08
You know why no one can hold you down?????? Wait for it wait for it..... Is because your ancestors fought for the right for you to have a decent education and uplift yourself. And even if you are from a mixed heritage, as i am, then it was someone elses great grand parents that fought the inequalities so that little black boys and little black girls only hold back would be themselves and not from a lack of an education or opportunity. Think on that for a min.
@ezra Thank you love. These fools need mad education.
My nationality, you mean AMERICANS??? LOL You hate Americans??? LOL
And I am Cablinasian, that's right, Black, White, N.American, and Asian. (:
And there are plenty of IR relationships outside of "google" that do make it, but it's hard trying to show you on a comment board of a d@mn blog. DUH!
And with all the [EXPLETIVE] about the "one drop rule" and taking MY MIXED PEOPLE as BLACK....I can say whatever the f*ck I want on here! LOL
TheTruth,
It was a time black women couldn't get on TV or dance in videos. Who were the video vixens then? lol another brother or sister with a slave mentality. "White people can do no wrong even when their the origin of all wrong in America". Slaves couldn't express the culture or values they were beaten and murdered for it.
@ the truth, how dare you put black women in category of vixen. What about 30+ year old black men still living at home without a pot to piss in holding onto his dreams of being an aspiring rapper, still hustling, and meanwhile has 2 to 3 baby mothers, in and out of jail, high school drop ouy. Some of you need to grow up. Now, how does it feel to be stereotyped. By the way, the black men that I described above, non of the white women are checking for. Except maybe for the hard dik because you wouldn't be able to afford the bubblegum . Get your money up!
First of all their are alot of money making black men married to black women. Why ppl called a man making alot of money a successful black man? You don't really have to have a milli to be successful. For those with common sense knw that success comes within. You can be a person making $50K a year and be successful. Its about how you carry yourself as a person. Raising your kids, takin care of business. My paps doesn't make $100K a year but he is a successful black man, because he raised good kids who all went to college, never got put in jail, and majority of the times do the right thing.
Jill is one of those angry over-weight woman who can't keep a man. Every time you turn around she wagging her finger in somebody's face jumping up to argue and fight. Her husband dumped her azz and her baby daddy quit her? She hard to please and get along with that's why. Her personal life is a mess and she looking around to blame somebody.
evilangel im so tired of hearin hoes black women explore your options , like black women that are single are holding out for the right black guy that is 100% BULLSHIT, I can assure 99% of the hoes who are single claiming they waiting on the right black men would not deny the advances of a white guy, the myth that single black women are holding out for black men is getting old and tired dont nobody wanna hear that [EXPLETIVE]
@blackberrybiz Ok not to put my business out there but lets go there. I'm a southern boy who has worked on a farm, raised animals, grew food to eat, worked in tobacco fields to raise money. My grandparents taught me about slavery and what they went through. My Mother told me how she had to walk to school while the white kids spit and them while they RODE by on the bus. So don't think I don't have a clue where I come from cause I've been there physically and mentally. I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth I worked hard to get where I am.
WHO GIVES A SH!T BLACK GUYS GO FOR THE WHITE WOMAN...THATS WHAT BLACK MEN USUALLY DO WHEN THEY HAVE A LOT OF MONEY..NOTHING NEW.INSTEAD OF WHINING ABOUT WHAT RACE THE BLACK MAN IS WITH OTHER THAN A BLACK WOMAN,BLACK WOMEN SHOULD BE WITH A WHITE MAN AND CALL IT EVEN.IM HAPPY BEING WITH MY BYFD AND HE IS WHITE..BUT IT DOESNT MATTER.HE TREATS ME VERY GOOD..AND I CAN CARELESS WHAT SOCIETY THINKS.JILL CAN GET OVER IT.
Even though I have thoughts about mixed marriage's, I dont think every black man or white women is toghter so the black man can use them. I have seen some white men married to Black women, and the Black woman is running things. I have seen sista'in shelter being beaten by their white husbands and lover's too also. Sometimes relationships start off by lust or infactuation, and the relationship ends bad.
Plus really on the black women. Lets b honest some of y'all head is up ur a$$es. Some of y'all don't deserve a good man. Some of y'all don't know what is GOOD MAN IS. Its not about money, looks, and body. Its about common sense. Some of y'all don't know how to love a GOOD Man. Y'all give them away. "He doesnt act tough" Real men hide their toughness until its time to defend our family. Be real, when y'all are 14-17 y'all on the thugs, so guys start being thugs. So when some of y'all getcha butt whipped or have a couple of kids, then you want a good black man to save you. HELLL NO.
@ Evilangel, you sound dumb! I don't even hate when I see a white women with a black man she can have him! Less stress for me to deal with. My WHITE boyfriend is leaps and bounds ahead of black men who are TWICE his age! I agree black men ain't sh!t, however you black women need to start demanding more from them then d!ick!
@ChasityLove
Because its the same sh it the media tells us that everyone is jelous of us Americans. You know all the bull about us being a "free" nation and all. I have no reason in the world to be jealous of a whyte woman. They are so recessive and only a mutation of the black woman. So Beckie's get over yourselves.
Damn I try so hard to be positive but this ignorance on this site kinda pulls me in. Got to work on that.
I think you're missing the point, shes not a racist or a bigot...what she is saying is that black men seem to have lost love for black women and you can clearly see it with the comments on here from men, its disgusting. I've never dated outside my race and I am open to it but at the end of the day I am a black woman who adores and loves my black men period. Thats what's lacking in black men. I've never in my life heard a black man say they date outside their race but love their black women. They always have some negative remark about why they date outside their race.
@clarkthink-When you posted that comment I started singing "Halo" by Beyonce...! Mad respect baby...! We all know this thread is subjected to reaching 900 hits by 12:00pm...The WW posting their slick a** remarks will easily make the muthaf*cka reach 1000!!!! I'm not even going to post a response for the topic because it's about to get heated on this be-i be-i....
I don't give a damn how Jill scott or any body else feels about who I date. I have never owned a slave and none of you have ever been slaves. Fyi Africans were not the only slaves and white Americans were not the only slave owners. Africans are still getting sold in to slavery today but not to Americans. If I want to Lay down next to a black man then I will. You don't like it? Go fu.ck yourself cuz I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU LIKE.
@blubabiecutie28
Not all rich black men go for white women. Some go for white women because some white women put out the goodie fast. I know alot of money making bruhs and they have good black wives. WHY? because those wives are independent and dont have the ego to go with it. Plus they understand what a good man is. And they fulfilled their husband needs. You barely have women who know how to be the true black women like them old skool women back in the day. Some of y'all call them "run overs" but they are not. Husband do for them as well as wives for her husband.
...there goes that lack of love and respect. And black women lets be truthfull....u know why it burns...because when you are black woman who loved a black man who left you to raise your children all alone, then you see a black man with a white woman happy and taking care of that family..thats what burns. Think about it..if you were in a happy, stable relationship right now would you even comment the same way? I know I wouldn't. I'm a single mom raising a black boy by myself, thats where the burn comes from and guess what I still love my black men!
@ ezra,
I know right. It was awesome meeting you. Hit me up because we need to keep in touch. pvtashe@yahoo
Well lovely black people I have to part and raise my strong black young son. We are going to brunch so I can brake a little knowledge off and then run some errands. Peace and love to you my beautiful black people.
Being biracial hearing this stuff always pisses me off! Why do people always go back to slavery? Like any of us were there! Why can't you just love who you love? Would she rather it be like back in the day when blacks couldn't be near whites? Let me stop before I go off on this trick. Her soul should be burning for having a child with a gay black man. I guess that's better than a straight white man.
A lot of you'll sound plain crazy. Knowing your history is not "living in the past." Some of you suffer from what I call "the new negro complex," meaning you want to act like you are so color blind and don't understand why some Black people feel as they do concerning black-white relationships. Yes, people of diff races can fall in love, but I'm not going to support IR at the expense of being historically ignorant or dismissive of some black people's feeling, legit in many cases, when they feel negatively towards it.
@emmettmays85
I dont think YOU are disgusting. Just the things you choose to say out of your mouth especially toward our black women. I know what your preference is and you prefer IR dating but dont dog us out every chance you get. I love being black. Im full of so much diversity and I have a strength in me that hails from my ancestors (the black line). I have and am still enduring white american hatered and it pains me to see such a beautiful black man choosing his words the way you do. But please know that when you insult women, some little black boy and girl are watching and taking note.
Maybe its not that ww are stealing bm its just that ignorant bw want to have children with other ignorant bm. Make better choices with who you choose to f*ck an maybe your children will have fathers and that bed wouldn't be empty. I don't feel bad for any woman whose father isn't in their childs life. You can tell by someone character what type of person they are. So have a baby with Ray Ray and see what happens.
@blackberrybiz I co-sign..that's what I'm saying, u want to date outside your race cool, but don't come up with reasons that belittle black woman as the excuse as to why you do it. That's so uncalled for! That's what makes us bitter, why is it so hard to love and respect your black women in conjunction with dating outside your race? Sounds like self hate especially when you came from a black woman. My black son can date and love whomever he wants but you best believe he is going to be taught to love and respect the black woman no matter what
Forreal bills must be due because a good race debate always does the trick. Jill Scott kills me she's one of those people who reads nonstop about slavery and history and thinks she knows it all. Unless you were there shut your mouth. We get the gist of slavery so enough with the "massa" crap and field and house n!ggers. "Oh our sisters have been raped for 400 years blah blah blah...".
blackberrybiz baby how do u know my preference ? im not even into white bitches that much there are some cute ones but for most part no, also for me using the word bitch thats just how i talk , i always been like this the only women in my family i havent called a bitch was my sista and my auntie(she would blow me away). also blackberrybiz u too cute to be worried about who other [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE]
@Ezra_Yisrael1970:
Agreed. I bought her book of poetry a few years ago and it is OFF THE HOOK.
Jill is only INTELLIGENTLY echoing the sentiments of millions of Black women. Of course most Black men NEVER want to hear us call them out on this, so get ready for the black male rebuttle about how we are angry, bitter blah blah blah.
By the way brothas, I HAVE a man and a good successful one at that, and I strongly agree with Jill about this topic. So you can save calling me bitter for another day.
Y'all praising the white men like they GODS GIFT. LMFAO. Men are all the same. Some of them are good, bad. Women are all the same. Some of them are good, bad. If you think white men are better than black men then you need to wake up seriously. Y'all forget y'all haven't MET EVERY BLACK MAN IN THE WORLD. Plus females what every you like men will go for it. You like thugs, men are gonna be thugs. You like cars, men are gonna get good cars. Its all about you. If women start say I want a good man at the age of 16 and REALLY MEAN IT. then you will have them.
It's true but interracial dating does not bother me what bothers me is the men who still carry the slave mentality that white is right and black is ugly, black is dirty, black is nothing. When they put all white women in a "beautiful" category, and black women in the "dirty ugly hoe" category. I've heard and seen it myself so I know what I am talking about.
I hate this kind of talk it makes us look bitter, clingy and filled with self-pity and we are NOT. I could care less who Black men associate with, I just want them to be happy and self-reliant. Take care of themselves and their children irregardless of the race of their spouse. We have a man of color in the White House who came into the world through the womb of a white woman who nurtured, loved and raised him when his father refused to.
Mto this is the best thin i have ever seem for awhile from yall but its true these black dudes need to get beat in they head u could like who ever makes u happy but they always seem to pick the dum white women who dont give a sh*t i jus dont kno how some of dem reach fame without a brain makes no sense to me
What makes me upset is that the brother's can't handle what this beautiful black woman is saying, that's why they are hating on her. She is speaking the truth about the black situation in this country. Yeah it's 2010 and you can love anyone, but what about the fact that our women have been on our sides from the beginning helping us to fight the powers that be. Through every struggle they have persevered, and what do they get? nothing but crumbs from this society. I see her point it's not fair for the black man not to support his woman...she's more than a hoe and a trick...she's royalty!
I SO AGREE WITH HER BECUZ SUM BLACK MEN DO IT AND PUT THEIR OWN RACE DOWN IF ITS GENUINE THEN THATS GOOD 4 THEM BUT 90% OF THE TIME IT HAS SUM NEGATIVE CONNOTATION ITS EITHER BECUZ "SISTAS HAVE 2 MUCH DRAMA" OR BECUZ THEY SECRETLY HATE THEMSELVES AND THEIR RACE BECUZ THEY WERE LEAD 2 BELIEVE THAT WHITE OR LIGHT IS SUM HOW SUPERIOR THEN BLACK & BROWN BUT WHATEVA PPL WHO THINK LIKE THAT AINT LIVING 100% ANYWAY AND EVENTUALLY IT'LL SLOWLY EAT THEM ALIVE INSIDE SO UNTIL THAT DAY FU.CK EM!!!!
I am a white woman who dates black men. I personally have never had any issues with that. I will date anyone who is respectful to me and to other people. Honestly if it is not your husband or boyfriend or even your son it shouldnt affect you. I can see a little hurt but I can say that I get irritated when I see someone who looks like a respectable person with trash. I cant stand that especially when I see a bm with a ww because she just looks like she thinks she is cute off of that when she looks ignorant but if he looks like it too then let it be. I dont date bm who only date ww yes they
I love Jill Scott and all BUT it sounds like she LIKED HER FRIEND AND WAS A BIT BITTER about him with a WHITE WOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!! I agree some black men are with white women for the wrong reason but some that's just what they fell for! GET OVER THIS RACIST VIEW.... in this age you'll be surprise not seeing mix couples and mix babies.
There's many black dudes out there who only deal with black females. We all have our soulmate and why stick to one race? Love has no color!!!!
I love my BLACK husband and all our mix babies to come LMAOO
** Let's focus on this CORRUPT Government!
Jill Scott has always been a hard talking and acting woman who drives her men away. It is either her way or the highway and her opinion is supposed to rule over everybody else's. If she allows what strangers do to affect her soul then that is her own damn problem. She is just the type of woman that most men don't want and a lot of these black dudes had mothers like her so now they don't want no parts of that kind of woman. Always jumping up in a mans face being loud and angry. It's an ugly way to behave and ya'll need to change.
U GUYS NEED TO WAKE THE [EXPLETIVE] UP...RACISM IS ALIVE AND WELL...YOU GUYS SAY ITS 2010 WE NEED TO MOVE ON AND PROGRESS BUT IF YOU GO TO ANY WHITE PROCLAIMED MEDIA SITES LIKE TMZ YOU CAN SEE WHITE PEOPLE...MEN AND WOMAN...SAYING THE MOST RACIST SLURS AND TERMS TOWARDS BLACK CELEBRITIES THAT ARE POSTED. ONE THEY DID ON KELLY ROWLAND MANY WHITE PEOPLE ESPECIALLY WOMAN SAID AND I QUOTE "TAKE THAT NASTY HOOD RAT WEARING DIRTY PROJECT MONKEY BACK TO AFRICA BECAUSE THIS IS AND ALWAYS WILL BE A WHITE COUNTRY...WHITE POWER"....SO FOR BLACK MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE INVOLVED IN IR...DON'T BEING IN DENIAL!!!!
Just by looking at the post on here the world can see how divided we are as a people and that's the problem....We wonder why the world see us as lost, well it's because we don't support one another. Black people are just like the Democrats that can't seem to get their heads out the crack of their azz...making it easy for the so called powers to hold us back. Wake the hell up black people!!!!!
do think that they are all that and are always making race issues about stuff. The men i date usually dont date ww because of what ever reason and those are the men who still love bw but they never bring up race issues to me. Not all bm who date outside there race are sellouts. As long as your happy you should be with whoever like i said the only time i cant stand certain things is when one race thinks they are better than everyone else because they can get someone outside their race.
..and black men you should feel offended that white women are only looking your way when you got your sh*t together. That's why you see it so much in the celebrity spotlight. I don't them looking your way when you're making $12 per hour living in you mother's basement. But black women, we take you any way any how because we have a love for you that you don't have for us. And its true, Obama was raised by a white woman and look who he married
@ TheTruth052489 I KNOW THATS RIGHT!!! Same thing here--- LEAPS AND BOUNDS! Shame on them for chasing after raggumuffins, having low standards to begin with, and being jealous that those same raggedy dudes don't want them. They better broaden their horizons if they don't plan on repeating that same vicious struggling single momma cycle.
U GUYS NEED TO WAKE THE FCUK UP...RACISM IS ALIVE AND WELL...YOU GUYS SAY ITS 2010 WE NEED TO MOVE ON AND PROGRESS BUT IF YOU GO TO ANY WHITE PROCLAIMED MEDIA SITES LIKE TMZ YOU CAN SEE WHITE PEOPLE...MEN AND WOMAN...SAYING THE MOST RACIST SLURS AND TERMS TOWARDS BLACK CELEBRITIES THAT ARE POSTED. ONE THEY DID ON KELLY ROWLAND MANY WHITE PEOPLE ESPECIALLY WOMEN SAID AND I QUOTE "TAKE THAT NASTY HOOD RAT WEARING DIRTY PROJECT MONKEY BACK TO AFRICA BECAUSE THIS IS AND ALWAYS WILL BE A WHITE COUNTRY...WHITE POWER"....SO FOR BLACK MEN AND WOMEN WHO ARE INVOLVED IN IR...DON'T BEING IN DEN
to all of ya'll sayin racism doesnt exist and we need blk women need to stop living in the past well hush up cuz it does to exist everyday with these damn white people they are too very racist I kno a blk guy who dated this white girl and he would tell me how she tried to belittle blk people like she was better than them trust me there are very racist people out there and i cant lie at times i feel very racist too becuz spanish, caucasion, indian and which ever other race thats out there feel they are above blk.
@angelaheiressnyc Exactly. We don't do that now. Because you do got the lames who dawg the sistas and you got the sistas who are forever mad at the lames and maddness goes to their daughters. So the daughters grow up thinking All black men ain't ish. I didn't grew up like that. Even the single black mothers in my community are not on that hate level. Nobody is teaching the values no more. And ppl don't wanna listen to the good values. I remember how black women and men wouldn't bash each other. But when Waiting To Exhale came out, it became a movement.
@jayanderson07:
I think its a SHAME that you've been rejected by a couple of black women or a few relationships didn't work out - that today you have such a sour taste in your mouth when it comes to speaking about what say is "some" of black women.
WHY not respond to the Black women who are intelligent, respectful, educated? WHAT would be your response to us? WHY are you SO QUICK to call out black women who supposedly have negative attributes? Is that all you've ever dealt with If so, then thats YOUR issue with who YOU choose to date. But don't come on here making generalizations about YOUR SISTERS - BLACK mothers, grandmothers, aunts. You should AUTOMATICALLY hold Black women higher than that in your mind. Think about WHY you are so quick to talk about the “bad” apples. Something has been brainwashing your mind brotha.
Okay...I'm so tired of black women saying that white women are EASILY CONTROLLABLE, DOCILE AND WEAK...AND THAT WE SUCK D*CK!!! YOU KNOW WHAT YALL NEED TO GET AT YALL MEN AND BE MAD AT THEM. I AM A PROUD WHITE WOMAN AND BABY I AM NOT DOCILE WEAK OR EASILY CONTROLLABLE! I AM JUST AS STRONG AS ANY BLACK WOMAN OR ANY OTHER RACE OF WOMAN AND MY NAME AINT BECKY EITHER! I DONT SUCK D*CK MY DEARS! AINT NO FREAK NEITHER! WANT RACIAL EQUALITY AND THEN BE MAD AT A WHITE WOMAN WHO ATTENDS A MOSTLY "BLACK" EVENT/CLUB THAT DONT MAKE NO SENSE! I AINT BETTER THAN U AND U AINT BETTER THAN ME!
She's being honest, and though i have love 4 all races, its the truth. As is, Black women already outnumber black men in America. So, when the small number of black men we DO have flock to get a white/Asian/Latina woman the minute they get 2 a degree and 2 nickels in their pocket, it does make us feel like we're not good enough. Then, if that weren't bad enough, certain blk men run smear campaigns against us (blk women seems 2 do the same thing too) I strongly blieve this is what whitey wants us to do, bcuz it is the best way to kill of our race.
im not saying that blk men need to date only blk women bcuz honestly i chose to stop caring becuz the pain u feel is heavy on my chest and i refuse to let it bother me anymore. but I feel blk people dont stick together like we should and mainly our men with the women i feel that the blk race is soon to be extinct there r gonna be so many mixed babies in the years to come and I just wondr if i should have a kid at all in a world like this where my blk people cant even stand together most blk kids dont feel pretty only the mixed girls really get looked at or the lighter ones this world has reall
My only problem with this way of thinking from black women is how they define (successful/good black man)…..I have 2 jobs one of which is at sears. now whenever I’m asked what I do and I say that I work at sears I immediately get the stair of inferiority…..every guy knows this look lol….it’s when a women doesn’t have enough respect for you to look you in the eye so she looks threw you as if you as if she was looking into the future….needless to say that when I’m at work at sears I strike out every time I step up to the plate…..now my real job is the money maker…I’m a longshoremen (casual) and whenever I say that I get the red carpet treatment….all of a sudden I go from being viewed as a “coon” to one of the good ones….someone that’s “on the same level”
the most crazy part is that the white girls and Latina girls at my sears job are more willing to give me the time of day then the black girls….then once people found out that I have a real job the sisters wanted to spend some time….at that point I saw threw their BS and it was clear that they don’t give a dame about a black man….they just want a man with money…..so I ask if it’s ok for black women to go for what they want then why can’t black men
@allergic2fake A VIDEO? Its discrimination everywhere. He didn' use a fat black beauty chick or fat white chick. Look at them R&B chiks videos they don't use short good black men. He is tall lite or dark with muscles. You gotta stop with that bitterness, because thats the problem with some sistas now. Too mad and bitter. NOT GONNA GET YOU NOWHRE Because a good black man don't want a bitter woman. So you just making it worst. Stop the bitterness LET IT GO. I'm good man, 5'7, nice body, I don't get pick because I'm short to alot of sistas and because I'm not a thug or a money machine. SO WHAT
conditioned our minds to see what beauti is so i feel a lot of black men think light skin is beautiful and long hair is too so whoever dont have long hair or light skin is beneath them. Blk I think would date out their race but other race men to me find us disgusting some of them not all but me as a blk woman is all for dating outside my race cuz blk men really turn me off wit the beckys and crap. but i get jill and where she is coming from but i dont care anymore cuz my happiness lies within me
I don't think black women have a problem with black men dating white women.
It's an ISSUE when black men act like white women are "EASIER" to deal with.
It's an ISSUE when black men ONLY date white women.
It's an ISSUE when there's a TREND of Black men reaching a certain success level and KEEP deciding to marry or date white women.
It's an ISSUE when black men have a PROBLEM with strong successful intelligent black women speaking their mind and would RATHER a meek white woman on their arm who they think wont make a fuss.
It's an issue when you all come RUNNIN back to us when the ish hits the fan in your white marriage and you wanna run back to the black community for support. But OF COURSE black women REGARDLESS of how we are portrayed, will ALWAYS be their to support black men. If ONLY we too could expect the same kind of UNCONDITIONAL SUPPORT from black men.
what up MTO? ok, first of all jill is a beauitful intellgent woman i am in shock wow! to hear that from jill i would never expected that from her and i thought she would be openminded woman but even famous ppl have an opinion i strongly disagree on her comment she disencougreing people of race for being happy free s to be themself this of america it free to country.... and i do think jill is jealous its personal
Notice how alot of women on mto have a problem with black men dating white woman but the moment mto puts up news about a black women dating a white man then its all you go girl and good for her!?! please believe in my experience those same women who have a problem with black men dating white women be the same chicks whos quick to turn a black man down whos tryna holla no matter how respectful his approach is but than your see them smiling in a white guys face, taking his number.....
Also, I am a black woman that loves my black father- no self hatred here. But the rest of these no good loser black men out there who only want to cheat, lie, have no goals, don't want to get an education, treat women badly. . .yall can have'em. Even the ones that are doing well are egomaniacs because black women are so thirsty for them that they have no reason to settle down. The year is 2010- not 1810. You segregation loving black women better wake up. Your truly "good black man" is 1 out of 1000. Adapt to your environment and broaden your horizons.
@kerrin, your statement could not be any more incorrect! Asians and hispanics DO NOT marry outside of their race commonly! And this is based on facts, not some faulty *ass survey. Sure, Europeans are viewed as the most "elite" race, and are preferably #1 world wide. But Asians AND Hispanics as a whole do not practice common interracial marriage ( in other words, they ain't down with the swirl, oggaahhhh! ) - shenehneh So do some more research before you try to sound like you know what you're talking about!
BLACK WOMEN DATE WHITE MEN! SO WHY IN THE HELL IS JILL SCOTT MAD AT BLACK MEN AND WHITE WOMEN? MY ANCESTORS DIDNT OWN NO SLAVES CAUSE OUR IRISH ASSES WERE BEING DISCRIMINATED AGAINST ALSO! U CAN LOOK THAT UP! MY FAMILY WAS IN THE SLUMS OF NEW YORK RUFFIN IT OUT WITH BLACK FOLK! JILL SHUT THE [EXPLETIVE] UP!!!!!!!!!!!
Hmmmmmm, I understand where Jill Scott is coming from. But for us to move forward as a Black community, we need to be able to learn to demarcate between acknowledging what happened in the past and being educated about how that transcends to the present day versus still being mentally bound by the shackles of the past. I think a lot of people who are posted here do not know the difference.
Because if some of you were properly informed of how historical forces of oppression shape modern society then this interracial dating point will be moot
@misshugrad Let me check you for a second. First of all, i did not generalize any women. Notice when I say SOME. SOME. Why? because they are some good ones and some bad one. I'm responding to the ones who have question about black men not being good black men because their are some good men but they are not getting looked because its so much focus on the bad and some women are focusing on them too much. the women in my past didn't leave a bad taste in my mouth because i'm not a bitter brother. I have my black women on the HIGH. Baby you really don't know me to try to check me. Seriously.LISTEN
I come from Brooklyn NY in an almost all black area East NY where I was the minority!!! My husband is a Black Man of West Indian decent. I am of mixed latina and white race but I am fair skinned. I see the racism from Black Women and at sometimes it almost starts a fight cause I'm not a softy like a BECKY!! Slavery is over! People can date who ever they want when I see white guys or latin guys with Black girls I'm all for it! Some of YALL NEED TO GET OVER IT!!!!And my husband aint a saint he's a criminal who changed his life but all black women when the see us frown up there face.get over it!!
@emmettmays85 Yes i am white and lilrisha is my nickname. My name is Meretia pronounced Merisha. Far from becky right? @evilangel I hate that so much i once talked to a guy and he said "if it aint light or white it aint right" i hate stupid ignorant stuff like that. I dont deal with it and when guys or people ask me what i am i hate that too it doesnt matter. I actually had a white guy try talking to me and when he asked what i was and i told him he was like oh i didnt know i only mess with light skinned or latinas and he said nice meeting you though what is that about.
I knew this comment section would be popping. Atleast this time it comes from an articulate source versus Reggie & KK. Sometimes in life a person truly does just happen 2 fall n luv with sum1 of the opposite race. I even did once with a coworker. The problem is too many blacks more than any other race are exclusively dating outside cus they feel it's an upgrade.
CONTD... A Harvard trained Critical Race Theorist Derrick Bell (A black man by the way, who quite teaching at harvard because they would not hire a black FEMALE professor, I say this, in case some of you, discount him for being a "sell out") talks about the convergence interest theories, that the plight of black peeps are only going to get better as a much faster rate if there is something to be benefited for the white man as well. Flowing from that theory, I do not see why anyone will want to advocate for keeping the "races" separate. I mean people should be allowed to date whoever they want
@misshugrad I'm puttting out what I see. You do have some black women treat white men greatly than black men. And sorry I did said Y'all. Sorry about that. But I don't have a sour taste in my mouth. If any sour taste I have is because this bash against black men is STILL GOING ON. We as blacks are fallin in relationship. Majority are not right in the mind. We are too divided. Everybody wanna be the boss instead of being co-CEOs. We blaming each other but not taking the responsibiity of our own actions.
Another view point could be that maybe it’s time for black women to start taking the bull by the horns and approaching the men that they want rather then waiting for one to come and find them….when I told this to my female cousin all she could do was laugh in my face as if it was beneath her to approach and ask a man out….the first words out of her mouth was “why do I have to do that when a white girl can just sit on her hands”…..and that’s when I said “well you’re the one that’s complaining about the situation”….and then I added on that she can sit around with her girlfriends and stew about how piss off that they are at black men for going with white/Asian/Latina women….but at the end of the day guys will only see them as sour chicks with attitude and will continue to avoid them….I guess that’s one of the big differences between black men and black women….guys just want to be happy by achieving their needs….women want to be happy but it has to come in a storybook way
OH LAWD!!!!! HOW IN THE F_UCK DO WE KNOW THAT THIS ESSAY ACTUALLY CAME FROM JILL SCOTT?!?! SMH! ALL THE BACK/FORTH BULLSH*T COULD BE ALL FOR NOTHING!!!! MTO IS PROBABLY LYING....AS USUAL!!! I'll NEED TO SEE AN ACTUALLY COPY OF THE ESSAY BEFORE I COME AT POSTERS FOUL AND UN-LADY LIKE...STOP REACHING MTO!!!
Black women dont worry about the black man anymore. Just start doing you. Cause when you start doing you. An kno longer want the black man. Kno other race will either. They only want what black women want. Cause without you the black man want be sh!t.
====
These IRR threads always leave me confused and mystified. I’m confused because I am fully aware that IRR isn’t just exclusively between Black men and White women…yet, hearing some of you on here…it would make it seem as if, IRR is only a black man’s disease.
Again, what are you upset about? Are you upset that black man is fukking some non-black broad?...Are you upset because you believe that black men who dates IRR are basing it on their fall-out or distaste for some black women…or are you upset about IRR in general? Be specific in your response?
Because, if you are upset about IRR then, clearly I’ve seem more fronting from black women on here, who claimed they are involved in IRR and are happy about it. In fact, there are more posters of black women with their white boyfriends and husbands on their Avi, promoting them as white Gods…in fact, there are more usernames of women on here that express their love for white men..
Again, I ask you broads on here…what is your real issue?
I find it interesting, that even a purported Tranny would come on a public Blog to express his dislike about who some anonymous black man is fukking…and encouraging black woman to “Just Start doing You”. Isn’t’ that odd? What is your agenda? Are you really a tranny or some MTO concoctions design to make a mockery of the Negro?
Ahahah!!! You women have away of cheapening your arguments and stances on these issues. You are too emotional and ruled by your feelings. Yet…despite all of the statistics and number on IRR…you are still hell-bent on believing your on made-up concoctions.
To my historians on here…many of you American Negroes have mix blood…not because of the Negro male fukking the Master’s white wife…it’s the other way around.
My argument is simple…if you disapprove of IRR, then disapproves them all…if you approve of one…then approves them all…if you are going to throw fire, throw flames at them all
The moment you began making excuses for some group versus others, your entire argument will fall on death’s ear…it make you sound painfully bitter and pathetic.
CONTD, and if they choose members from another race, and have mixed children, do you agree that that white mother or white father, might be more sympathetic to the cause of the oppressed group, seeing that their partner or child belongs to that group?? I mean is that a possibility? I just say this, because I am not one to dwell on historical injustices as much as it PAINS me. I d rather devise ways to at least help ameliorate the consequences of said injustices. And I just do not see how a black man dating a white woman OR a black women dating a white man, can be detrimental to this cause.
2: blk women Most of u do frown up when u see a blk man with a white woman stop it & don't stare. They just get a rise out of it. U kno most of the time their ugly or out of shape anyways aka a white mans reject.
To BM date Becky all u want just dint stereotype & disrespect BW n the process. To WW: Quit being so insensitive. U will never understand what it's like 2b black. I adopt a black skinned African child & watch then come home many days crying from getting teased about their hair texture & skin color.
@jayanderson07:
There are sistas on this thread talking about all sorts of things. I’LL SCROLL up to see WHERE black women are saying “bad” things about black men in this thread. Seems like most of us were discussing black men dating outside their race. Here you come with the “some of ya’ll dont deserve good men”. For some REASON your brain automatically went to this rant about bad apples.
Take it a STEP HIGHER and respond to those of us who are living life successfully.
And no one is trying to "check you". Why the sensitivity and defensiveness? Please don't tell me your gonna be a black man who cant handle a black woman with a strong opinion. Next I’m gonna be called “bitter” right? It’s called a DISCUSSION. Can you handle that brotha?
OH! And another thing that ive noticed with this interracial thing. When a blk man, and even a blk woman, gets a in a relationship with someone white, they r married within a few years. Conversely, when blk men/blk women get into a relationship with a blk person, they could b dating for 10 yrs sometimes with CHILDREN, they STILL very rarely get married. U cant tell me this is only by chance.
Educate yourself, playing ignorant is even more insulting to the matter. It has been less than 70 years, of us Having a newfound freedom. My brother's don't forget Emitt Till. Wolves in Sheep Clothing. Do some history homework...read what your parents, grandparents, uncles, and aunties went through to give you the right to speak freely NOW!
In Jill Scott entire essay she explain how she felt about IR dating, But she never once gave valid reason as to what's wrong with it! Or the harm of it! Only at the end of her essay did she say how sistas with fatherless babies could use those *Successful blk men*... I challenge anyone in hear to give me a valid reasoning why IR dating is wrong, and Why people should date and marry only of there own color!
You got to remember alot of women have bad experience from black males since the age of 16. Some of them wanna date an older men thinking they on the same level as them. Don't know that older men can trick a young chik on doing things he want her to do. Some of y'all went against what daddy want you to date. He want you to date a good brother, but no you wanna date the bad boy. And when you date a few more and get your heart broken you want to be mad and bitter and say all men are dawgs when daddy TOLD YOU From the beginning get the good brother.
@kerrin: Hispanic isn't a race but a nationality/heritage/culture. Not trying to use myself as an example but I was born & raised in Honduras,Central America but I'm still very much a black woman or Afro-Hispanic...just saying Hispanics just like AA/Blacks come in all shades with an array of physical features.
@AzShun: AGREED.
LMAO at people thinking we have come THAT far. The biggest difference today is that it is INSTITUTIONALIZED RACISM. But i'm not surprised, these kids today are so self-absorbed. They have a LONG way to go. Hopefully one day they'll get there.
And if the way the GOP is treating Barack isn't proof ENOUGH of the REALITY of this country's attitude towards people of color, I don't know what is.
@misshugrad Yeah some women don't deserve a good brother just like some men don't deserve a good woman. Some ppl can't handle what a good man brings to the table. Some don't know how to deal with a good man because their common sense are not shaped right because all the bs she's been through. Why would a good man should date a woman who don't know how to treat a man good, who to be a good woman, be a good mother to kids, etc. Damn I if don't know how to be a good man, WHY do I deserve a good woman. Ppl got to get their MIND RIGHT. POINT BLANK. And this is a debate. lol. I LOVE THE CHALLENGE.
What we embody is everything 'they' could and would not understand. To indulge everyday, knowing you are sneered at, and looked down upon, we still hold our head high in the air, proving you, nor 'they', will break me from this fight. We are NOT confused, however YOU are, the unspeakable remaints from that day when YOU were bound and gagged, and did NOT even have an IDENTITY, YOU were their farm machines, maids, as well as beating bag when 'They' had a bad day. You make it look easy to forget, we make it hard. We fight hard to make sure there is a relevence to our being, You do not.
Bi-polar
Re-Read the essay and tell me that she didn't articulate the shyte out of her thesis! Very well received, so I am interested in reading more of her work! Hey tiplite I read ur responses the other day to Manifest and it was impressive! BTW, Jill is making her opinion known! This type of writing is the same content that Hill Harper was spewing & we see who he choose as a mate.
@misshugrad-Thanks love! I'm glad I'm hearing from someone besides MTO. Lol! Thanks for correction. :) @Da_advocator-Once again, your intelligent has shown through. Granted, your post are raw, uncut and hard to digest but you never disrespect anyone by calling them words of profanity and slinging mud and doing "the dozen". Two thumbs up (wink).
The whole point is to forget about the bridge that brought you over so you date outside of "black" or if you do date a black women that is brown or dark, make sure you keep reminding her that you could do better (white or biracial) so she should be grateful. That has been the game for 10 years. I am all for exercising options in 2010.
IR dating is not wrong but noone should date exclusively outside their race it doesn't make theoritical sense. What possible reason could one have? What is this preference it should not include generalizing or European features. If I have a son I will encourage him to marry a good moral, educated BW, becus their is a shortage of educated, black 2 parent homes. Hey Tastysis
@akademics7 Some of them don't know. They think a woman who handle her business, take care of their kids and take no ish from a man or anybody.
I'ma dude and my grandma and many other elder old skool told me that saying is true but not he answer. A strong black woman is a person who weathering many storm and still keep a good character. Meaning that if a negro dawgs them they will keep their head up high and move on. Not slashing tires, keying cars, cutting his penis or calling and stalking. She keeps a good smile on her face and move on.
My question is who really wants to be with a black man anyway. They are nothing but trouble - even the succesful ones.
===
There you go...yet, despite the fact that many of you women feel this way about the black man, you still bitch and complain about who he is fukking.
Why? is it about control? is it about abandonment? Is it about jealousy? Do you want white women for yourselves? It is about making yourself appear better and bigger than the black man?
What is it about? ahahah!! Please enlighten me..
If everybody was as narrow-minded as she is there wouldn't be a man of color in the White House; not that I agree on everything he does. I guess she wouldn't mind if a crackhead black man married a white woman since she placed the emphasis on successful. This is a trip, how you gonna tell grown folks who and what they should marry nowadays. And it seems that the more people speak against it the more folks gonna F**K you they want. Besides, it is a two-way street. Black dudes and white women do freaky things together.
@tiplite2004 she said nothing of the sort that IR is wrong. she simply took the time out to explain how she felt and justified her feelings through the essay. i completely understand where shes coming from. its not wrong @ all to date outta of ur race however this is and forever will be a personal issue among blk men & woman. its like we blk women were blk mens backbone through the worst of times and when things looked seemingly better they go and date from the exact same race that had hated us for so many yrs wat a slap in the face.
@emmetmay:
Well when caucasian people have been enslaved for 400+ years and their motherland has been exploited almost past recovery THEN it can be called "hypocrisy". Until that day comes us, even if I wanted to, I couldn't even come close to comparing the history of blacks versus whites and all of our present day conditions. Two COMPLETELY different playing fields. Like comparing apples to oranges.
I wouldn't even disrespect our ancestors and their struggle by calling black attitudes "racist". That's an insult.
Jill, you answered your own questions. Yes, you are jealous of the white woman, and the favor she received. You're angry and bitter about it, understandably so.
But LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION. HOW does holding onto that bitterness benefit your life?? You are successful and gorgeous and no one is denying you of any freedoms today.
The sting you feel has alot more to do with your own insecurities, than anything that man or woman has done to you. You are giving away your power by placing BM on the same pedestal WW were once placed on. Let it go....
Greekness
I am of African decent & was born in America! Africa & Hati r suffering at the hands of the Europeans! Why is it pausable 4 me 2 discuss the damage that goes on in a country that I am not a native of, when we have our own problems here! This is the topic of the day! Not Hati, & not Africa. Stick 2 the subject or leave! This topic goes much deeper than who a brotha chooses 2 wife. I wouldn't expect u 2 understand, or delve deeper than the surface.
IR dating is not wrong but noone should date exclusively outside their race it doesn't make theoritical sense. What possible reason could one have?
===
Ok...so you argument is one person, should date exclusively outside of their race. So, a black man can marry a white woman, just as long he had dated or fukk black women in the past?
My question to you is...how many black men versus black women you know date exclusively outside of their race...meaning they have never dated their own?
I am a business woman, with degrees to match, Not racist, however outspoken, passion is always behind my thoughts, I appeal to every race, I do not see my self beneath anyone, however I am above my own expectations. Raised Southern Baptist, and so so blessed. He makes it impossible to NOT see. Bring up each other.
I agree with Jill Scott. Blackmen have no respect for the Black race, Culture or Family anymore. Like Jill, I find, it EXTREMELY DISTRUBING when I see any Blackman with a white woman.
It is such a loss, and it is dishearting to see it. I guess, Blackmen feel so much better with a Becky on their arm until white society lets them know how they really feel about them.
I saw her in a preview of her new movie and she portrays exactly the kind of black woman we don't want. Loud, angry, threatening to kick her man's ass, mean as a snake. She couldn't hold her first marriage together, she couldn't hold on to her second baby daddy now she is breathing fire. This woman needs to check her attitude and figure out why men keeping running away from her fat angry ass.
Even though Ms. Scott placed her words in a very eloquent manner and I respect her for giving an opinion however I’m going to have to disagree. First of all, there is no ownership between Black men and women. Why in the world does she feel her “soul is burning” whenever she sees a Black man with a white woman? How is this or why is this going to affect her? Many sistas as well as many brothas have this automatic assumption whenever they see a BM with a WW or WM with BW that he/she is a sellout when 9 times out of 10 (10/10 lol) they don’t even know the men or women and their reasons for dating. It seems to me that the reason why people pay attention to other people’s relationships because they’re not in one or are in one but are not satisfied. I really don’t understand why many people are getting their panties in a bunch when the OVERWHEMLING majority of BM date or marry BW and vice versa. No matter what their social-economic status, BM gravitates towards BW and its well over 90%. The rest are in interracial relationships (which is less than or close to 10%). The comparison of the two percentages is not significant. There’s this racial fear mongering that has been imposed towards the Black community making many believe that when BM they become successful or remotely successful that they ALWAYS go grab a WW. Now in SOME cases yes, that does happen but many people especially BW believe that occurs every time when in fact it doesn’t happen as often as they would think. I think the media has a major role into this mentality. In the case of BM, the ones who are very popular (entertainers, businessmen, athletes, and political figures) that are in interracial relationships are GOING to receive the most attention from the media. The ones who are dating or marrying within their own race, do not get the same attention as those who are outside. The media does not focus on things or events that happen within the norm but rather look at different occurrences because that would be boring to the public. This distorts or alters the perception of many BM/BW as they are continually being bombarded with things such as what’s been stated above and do not happen on a grand scale. Maybe it’s because I’m a man but I really don’t understand why so many BW feel the way Jill Scott does when there’s SO MUCH evidence that goes against this. Now I want to digress a little, when I hear a BW say that there’s a shortage of “good” BM, I say to them “Do you think you deserve one?”.
@ all to date outta of ur race however this is and forever will be a personal issue among blk men & woman. its like we blk women were blk mens backbone through the worst of times and when things looked seemingly better they go and date from the exact same race that had hated us for so many yrs wat a slap in the face
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That's another myth...you being the backbone...i would make a case for that several centuries ago...not today...not the moment you were transplanted to the the "Americas"...the backbone was broken long ago
It is such a loss, and it is dishearting to see it. I guess, Blackmen feel so much better with a Becky on their arm until white society lets them know how they really feel about them.
====
i agree...now go get you a white boy and show black men how proud you are...
ahahaha!!! again you sound pathetic...
My problem is that ppl date outside because of the hate they have with their race. "I can't find a good black man, so I'ma go white.". "I'ma date a white woman, because I see nothing but baby making gold digging sistas." And thats just BS. If you date outside, do it because you find the person LIKEABLE. Doing it because you tired of black men or black women is just a cornball statement. You just had bad choices.
another thing alot of successful [EXPLETIVE] come from da hood filled hoodrat bitches who love thugs and they did'nt want the educated [EXPLETIVE], these [EXPLETIVE] were called pussies a becuase they did'nt have a criminal record, or bullet wounds, bitches thought they were soft becuase they treated these hoes with respect , these hoes chose the bum ass [EXPLETIVE] who aint [EXPLETIVE] over them and when these bum ass knock these hoes up and abandon them with a bastard child they lookin stupid and wonder why the [EXPLETIVE] who got they [EXPLETIVE] together dont wanna be bothered with them
@liquidcracc... I understand... Blk Women and blk men where together exclusively for 1000's of years but the last 400 years we where force to only date one another because of fear of what would happen if u jump that fence! Now... The blk men are not like me.. They are not just fuc.king these women of different races! They're marrying them which means they love them and we all know u can not control the heart..
Saying that, Black men need to wise up and take care of business. Keep your asses in school, learn a trade, stop popping out babies with different women, stop partying all the time and grow up
====
Great...I like that...bravo...every black men should expire to greatness...
Now..what does that have to do with IRR?
I for one am not an advocate of mixing the races. Although the children don't have a choice, it just causes too many problems. We are living in the judgement now! My thing is why after 6,000 years all of a sudden everybody is equal. Those snakes are using their last weapon to take you to the fire with them!
If a large number have a allowed black men to reduce them to big booty-shaking ghetto-fabulous chicken-heads on strip poles in denigrating rap videos, what is there left to respect & uphold about black females who accept being called every dirty name in the book and reduced to worthless babies mommas? Jill you married your so-called Black Prince, what happened? Check yourself, love & relationship is more than just a color. Stop being bitter & stuck in back in the day. Back in the day, Black men respected & courted Black women.
The blk men are not like me.. They are not just fuc.king these women of different races! They're marrying them which means they love them and we all know u can not control the heart..
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You make marriage sound like an unbroken covenant and a stamp of true love...for every marriage there is a divorce...
The whole institution of marriage is cheapen...hell, even a "guy" like sexytranny can get married....it's overrated....
This whole system is overrated. So, i wouldn't base your argument on which race of men are marrying which race of women.
Just think about it for a second. They didn't start pushing this agenda ( irr) until the most honorable and humble Elijah Muhammad exposed them as devils. Then all of a sudden it was everybody is equal, and we should all love one another. How anyone can put 6,000 years of documented history out of their minds is insane!
i can say this JILL hit the nail on the head she is saying what a lot of black intelligent succesful black sisters want to say and that is a fact she touched some seriouse points that we realist can relate to we can all walk around like it aint so.....yes it is so....racism still exist it has been lingering like a rhino virus but since we have OBAMA it has now brought its uglyness back to the front of the line......every other race can voice there opinion and nothing is said but when the race of all kinda shades of black take that opportunity...the answer is always get pass this get over that..
@AlonzoE: riiiight, so all black women are loud and mean as a snake? Thats the type YOU have been choosing to interact with.
@emmettmay: I notice a lot of brothas have the same mentality as you do - we shut down the smart brothas and went for the thugs?
To me this seems like many black men seriously internalized getting turned down by a black women - maybe sometime in elementary or h.s. I know men are more sensitive than they let on, but when will you let that go? Release whatever experience happened to you. There are PLENTY of good sistas out there who will appreciate you.
I for one am not an advocate of mixing the races. Although the children don't have a choice, it just causes too many problems. We are living in the judgement now! My thing is why after 6,000 years all of a sudden everybody is equal. Those snakes are using their last weapon to take you to the fire with them!
====
These delusional negroes know they not equal, no matter how many white men or white women they fukk...
They know that...they are grasping for straws...A Negro will always be a Negro to any Caucasian... and the let the liberal talk fool you.
as usual the only logical blog ive read so far:
My argument is simple…if you disapprove of IRR, then disapproves them all…if you approve of one…then approves them all…if you are going to throw fire, throw flames at them all
The moment you began making excuses for some group versus others, your entire argument will fall on death’s ear…it make you sound painfully bitter and pathetic. *******
If blacks are not mating with other blacks, then who are making black people? You can embrace your culture and that does not mean you are anti-white. In about 50 years, America will consist of mixed people and true blacks will not exist in America. Remember, it takes black women to create the black men that women of all races love. When you mix, you are eliminating black men too because white or non black women cannot create the Morris HCestnuts and Blair Underwoods. God created that way, so why are we having a problem with it?
Both bm & bw have issues --real shocker. We both complain about the other side concerning IR dating, ignorant baby mommas & daddies, lack of respect twds & for each other & a whole myriad of issues. We have both intelligent & ignorant people in our community--the problem is that the ignorant ones do the most & loudest talking i.e. the need to be seen. Dig deep enough and both bm & bw can uncover a lifetime worth of dirt & issues on each other. Nobody is better than anybody...period! There's nothing wrong w/"schooling" anyone so long as you've learned all your lessons first.
@emmettmays85 It's true! I didn't say all. This excludes the hardworking, educated men with value. Most of you are rightfully taken and there are not enough of you available. This is a result of most of hour men being in gangs or coming out of prison. That experience lead some being on the DL. Go to the black inner cities & see for yourself or see how many times your propositioned by a gay or DL man. Most doesn't include all Black men. Statistics, STDs, baby daddys, prison rate do not lie!
@sexytranny Yeah some of them do that. I get that. Let it be known that you have black men who help black women believing themselves and support them and respect them. YET they get called weak. What about the fathers who STAYED and raise their daughter and she treat the no good negro better than her own FATHER. You got some black men who handle their business as a family man, but the same wife will let her friends throw him under the bus and she will never defend him.
Wow Jill Scott is a fat scorned blackwomen who needs to let it go. Its 2010 and most blackmen would want a whitewomen over her.
Also IR are on the rise and blackwomen are finding happiness with non blackmen.
Also the Becky name is getting old and annoying. Most whitewomen dont date blackmen anyway. Also many are strong and spoiled and have high expectations. Blackmen only get the stupid ones. Blackwomen stuck in the past will only suffer more.
Thank you Jill Scott for being that strong black woman to speak for so many of us. I do remember a young boy named Emmet Till, whose eye was cut from his head because he spoke to a white woman. Black men have walked away from us as young girls/children, and then again as women. Suddenly again, we are not good enough, are kids can't be pretty enough, (unless they are mixed), and we don't know how to act. It seems that once they finished using and abusing us, they moved on to whitey, and left our beds stone cold empty.
f blacks are not mating with other blacks, then who are making black people? You can embrace your culture and that does not mean you are anti-white. In about 50 years, America will consist of mixed people and true blacks will not exist in America.
=== I agree...
I love hearing fools speak on race mixing as if it will improve your standing in this world...ahahaha!!!!...
Tell me how many mix breeds are running things...and better yet, how have they improve the Negro Condition here and on the Continent?
After reading some of the comments on this website, I can see how easy it is to enslave and brainwash black people. We have been braisnwashed to feel guilty when we exude black pride because whites cannot deal with our unity. Whites did not burn down our churches and businesses because they were bored. They did it because they do not want blacks to prosper. White men and women do not want their children to mix outside their race but they deal with it if it means to destroy and not help the black community.
Some good black man don't stand out to black women till they with somebody else. Guys that come up to you with proper english, respect, and serious goals are overlooked. Some good men don't provide that thrill that a street dude with game may provide. I'm black and heard I talk proper so I wasn't they type. Had a latin on my arm then I got called Wesley Snipes. Don't think some even know what they want but go out blaming black men. I'm going where I can have me a WIFE, no matter what race.
When will we let go of our adolescent tween-age angst! I was called chocobliss all thru middle school by blk boys and it didn't make me want to date a hispanic or white boy when I grew up! U dudes need to let that sheet go already! How old r u now? We all were treated poorly at one point or another by blacks because that is all we were around! Its not a consipacy! If u grow up around nothing but whites, and u r the only black u will find flaws in them too! Stop the bafoonary
"Jealousy" has NOTHING 2 do with "black women" being disenChanted with upstanding "black men" choosing caucasion "women";treatn them like "queens". It's devastating. It's as if "credible black men" look down on "us" once they're "made" opting for other races or even going GAY, rather than be with a black woman_We hold it "down" for our men and go "thru..." only to be disgarded...shame,Just an observatn. JILL SCOTT, LOVE YA My Sister, keep on keepn it real!
@CeWest asks what about black women dating white men?
Earlier i typed: I wish someone would do a study bc i have a feeling WAY more black men date interracially then black women.
And this is NOT all by our choice. CLEARLY we are generally viewed at the bottom of the totem pole by men of other races. But a lot of men do not give us the time of day like they will other races.
Earlier I said, the reason mainly black women complain about this is: #1 the HISTORY behind it. self-explanatory. #2: many black men who date IR, it rubs us as you all reaching a certain income level and so it become a status symbol, or seeing them as “easier” to deal with.
When black women do it, many may have grown tired of what they see as black men not appreciating us. OR we just fall in love with someone. Generally we do NOT do it as a status thing.
But I dont think we can compare black women dating IR to black men dating IR because it DEF seems like black men have been doing WAY more of it.
Why are there such staggering differences in the numbers? I could be wrong, but I’m gonna have to speak on the assumption that more black men date IR than black women. And that should be a COMPLIMENT to you brothas! Be flattered instead of telling us we need to stop being “bitter”.
OF COURSE there are black women dating IR that have gotten sick and tired of dating black men. And as a matter of fact, I encourage more black women to do this.
I DONT have a prob with black men dating IR, I do have an issue with it when they try to demonize all black women as if we are LACKING in some area. That is offensive to us, especially considering the struggle that have faced and continue to face, which we EXPECT you to understand, as our black brothers. OF COURSE it burns to the core, when you all start attacking us and our personality differences, esp considering the way white women have historically been put high on the “beauty” pedestal in society.
@sexytranny Have you ever HEARD A BLACK MAN SAY HE CAN DO WITHOUT A WOMAN? HELL NO. there are some black men who believe that. As a whole NO. because you got some who don't believe and some who feed from women that they don't wanna believe it. Just like now. You got women who believe that their are no good black men. but they are. some don't believe because they pick the wrong ones and fall from that and you got some who just negative.
Jill is just speaking her mind and while slavery is over, you cannot ask us to forget the past and "get over it". The ones who say this are the first ones to use the effects of slavery as an explanation for why they are not successful. The fact is there are more Black men dating outside of their race than any other. As such, it is hard for a Black woman to find a suitable partner and there aren't mass amounts of White men willing to marry Black women but you will see mass amounts of Black men willing to marry White women. I'm all for IR but the proportions are skewed. Just saying...
@QueenieE last i noticed, fckn someone of the opposite race never brought along world piece. relationships don't change how one race views another. there are a lot more issues concerning race than whether people date interracially.
i commend Jill on her story and i think it was very well put. i can't even count how many times i've heard black guys talk shi.t about black females. a woman is a woman no matter what her race and if you can't take being with one, then that's just your problem. i'm fine with either race, but i'm most comfortable with black guys. it's OK to admit it people!! lol
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
EVERYBODY GO FUK YOUR SELF AND GET A LIFE!
Black men and women, when one of us beat the odds, lets help another black woman or black man beat the odds to. White women are taught to marry men of high status, with money, someone who will generate attention; she is not considered being a gold digger but being smart. Black women that try and do the same thing, are considered GD's. White women will always play games because they know they will always win. They are beloved by their people and by others over their own. What a wonderful position.
@da_advocator Is It Any Of There Business Who We Fuking Can't We Fuk Who Ever We Want to Fuk? Is It Our Fault That They Are Soooo Insecure?
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no question...any Negro, male and female will fukk whomever they want...with or without my approval.
Now, with that said...fukk whomever you like...in the grander scheme of things...you are still a Negro and will die a Negro...no matter how many non-black broads you fukk..
@scodelic Exactly. I'm educated and all. I hide my toughness because thats what a good man do. Hide his toughness unless he has to defend his family. Good man get put on the self like a teddy bear and never touch. Some chicks just wanan hold on to us after they buff Rico, Lil Bo Dat, 50, etc. Then when some of them done got beating and hurt they want us to be there for her and the 8 kids by 10 different dudes.
White women are taught to marry men of high status, with money, someone who will generate attention; she is not considered being a gold digger but being smart. Black women that try and do the same thing, ====
You are using white women as your role model...really?
Even white men are running away from them by hoards...
Are you serious?...ahahahaha!!!!No wonder you black women are single...you emulating the wrong group...
Go ask a white man how he really feels about his whtie woman...but, make sure there are no cameras...otherwise, he won't speak the truth.
I am out
This woman had two black men drove them both off. She is malicious and full of herself. She goes to her friend's wedding and sees that he is happy and it burns her soul? To see other couples happy burns her soul because she is unhappy and can't hold on to her relationships. it is time for her to look at herself and figure out what she is doing wrong instead of worrying about what other folks are doing.
@Kerrin, Bxtch, A:how am i being a muhhphuckin hypocrite? B: the only reason they do that sh*t is to get a *[EXPLETIVE] citizenship an hopefully some damn wealth. C: I've lived all over the U.S. and i currently reside in the bay (one of the most diverse places in America) and you specifically targeted Filipinos which couldn't have made your *ass sound any dumber. Flips look down upon marrying someone of another race, especialy black, both here in the U.S. and in the Philippines! The same with mexicans, so quit basing your shiht off of statistics(which are often wrong)and get a primary source, bxtch
@sexytranny You wanna get on black men. What about the black women who are not making good selection and blaming all men for their bad choices? What about the sisters who diss good black men? Talk about that. You forget that men are a big part of the black race as well. What about the brothers who don't get no respect? The good brothers? ANSWER THAT. reason why voices are not heard is because they'll get CALLED A PUNK by WOMEN as well as some men.
U SISTAS KILL ME ALWAYS TALKIN BOUT U HATE BROTHAS WIT A WHITEGIRL I MEAN Y WE ONLY SEE DIS WIT MOSTLY YALL AND NO OTHER RACE OF WOMEN I MEAN STOP IT ALREADY U LIKE DA PRESIDENT WHO IS FROM BLACKMAN/WHITEGIRL RELATIONSHIP BUT U HATE OTHER BROTHAS WHO AINT WIT SOMEBODY WHO LOOKLIKE YALL STOP HATIN AND DISCRIMINATING DIS ONE OF DA REASONS YALL ALWAYS TALKIN BOUT YALL CANT FIND A GOODMAN CAUSE YALL NOT DIVERSE LIKE DA BROTHAS IT AINT BOUT COLOR SISTAS BRAINS/BEAUTY HAVE NO COLOR WE ALL LOOK ALIKE ONDA INSIDE.
I think it's simply a fear black women have, that black men with options are not choosing black women when he can choose "other", beacuse he finds them more beautiful. It's not about slavery or the past, it's about black womens insecurity about their appearance in comparison to long haired beauties of other ethnicities. My two cents anyway.
misshugrad i dont have problem with gettin hoes , im just talkin bout the [EXPLETIVE] who the hoes overlooked because they wasnt gangsta , and im sorry but the succesful black men who has they [EXPLETIVE] together that are with white women did not grow up havin sista after them which is why they went to a white woman or non black women are the few sistas who wanted a [EXPLETIVE] with they [EXPLETIVE] 2gether
steelereers)it is what it is they are considered as becky's because there is nothing they wont do and lets get this understood......90% of the mix relationships especially in hollyhood if that black man dont have $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$.....there will be no way they can bring them home to there momma with out that cash$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$...trust
Intelligent_Miss
Speak on it! It is the intent of the media to over looks and not put to the forefront Slavery and Racism! When is the last time Roots, Sankofa or Rosewood came on T.V.? Whites do not like race mixing because they don't want their daughter to be tainted by the black sweat of the African Slave unless he has a wicked Jump shot! LOL! Then mixing isn't so bad, plus it would appear that mixed black men r far less intimidating then a full on black Adonis!
MTO IF YOU WERE GOING TO LEAVE IT ALONE YOU WOULDNT HAVE POSTED THIS SHYT.
AND WHO CARES ABOUT JILL'S FAT AZZ. THIS IS BITTERNESS AT ITS BEST. JILL'S HUSBAND LEFT HER THEN HER FIANCE LEFT HER RIGHT AFTER. SO SHE BITTER AS HELL THAT HER FAT AZZ CANT KEEP A MAN. AND INSTEAD OF LOOKING IN THE MIRROR TO UNDERSTAND WHY SHE WANNA BLAME THE WHITE WOMAN.
JILL IT AINT THE WHITE WOMAN FAULT YOU CANT KEEP A MAN. PUT THE FORK DOWN AND STOP MAKING SONGS ABOUT EATING FRITS AND SHYT AND CHECK YOUR ATTITUDE (ANYBODY WHO SEEN THIS CHICK LIVE KNOW SHE GOT ONE) AND MAYBE YOU CAN KEEP A MAN AND STOP HATING.
"It's as if "credible black men" look down on "us" once they're "made" opting for other races or even going GAY, rather than be with a black woman_We hold it "down" for our men and go "thru..." only to be disgarded...shame"
====
one more thing....who new so many of you were that pathetic....honestly...if this is the lot of black women to which to choose from....I understand why some choose to stay away...
ahahaha....hey, If within the next hour a black man don't smile or look at you...then, I would make sure there is no unsuspecting odor leaking from one of your orifices...I find it hard that so many available black women would have so much hard time attracting eager black men
hahahah!!! I get it…these black men aren’t millionaires….so, you probably dismissed them ….As Jill Scott so lovely put, he has to be rich….in order to be considered successful….
You broads have missed the boat…if you waiting for a baller….pick a number….there are 1000s of women in line waiting for the same thing….ahahaha!!!
I am out…
Yes, this is it, Jill. "Brothers" love to emulate everything the White man does and has--right down to his raggedy women. Another fact about today's "brother" is when presented with these facts, he goes on the defensive because like white men, he hates to be accused. Recalled what I've stated about the bones of the Black Woman being found solely. The Strong Black Man can't be found for miles around!!!
@emmettmays85 I have to agree. I went to a black school from K to 11, I wasn't getting alot of love from the sistas because i was short. But when i got to a white school in my senior year the white girls show me MAD LOVE. And the black girls were mad. Some ppl just don't bother you until u have something or when they see somebody else showin you love. Even Laura Winslow didn't start liking Steve Urkel until he dated Myra. Myra's not white but you get the picture.
I agree with her, but I'm not jealous. I do see where she's coming from. Jill, you're just adding more fuel to the fire. I think most black enjoy making black women mad or at least they think majority of y'all are mad. Some of the white women actually think they're more superior than the black woman because of all the b.s. the black man been running back telling her. The white woman can have that headache, honestly. That's all they are anyway.
misshugrad ah ha u just proved what i been saying all along and that is no one ever question the validity of a black women /white man relationship, but the black man /white women relationship is awlays put under the microscope and people question the motive behind their relationship so basically u are saying black women love with a white man is more genuine than a black man love with a white women? hypocrisy at its finest, also i find it funny when people talk bad about black men in IR dating but they embrace people like obama
@sexytranny But do you really THINK that a brother would let a white person call a black woman a "b" face up and let them get away with it. HELLLLLLLLL NO. you comparing internet to visual. You got talk shows and NOBODY DEFENDS black men. Why are their no positive talking for black men? Its all about baby daddy. WHOS THE BABY DADDY? IS HE THE BABY DADDY? WHAT KINDA MESSAGE IS THAT?
@emmettmays85 YOU HIT IT ON THE SPOT DUDE. You don't hear them talking about Halle dating a white man. Sanaa Lathan and other successful black women dating outside. You don't hear women bashing them. You hear "Well she probably got dawg by black men" or "Thats good for her get your white man girl. Black men are dating outside why can't we"
@Heaven. Jill has been married to a black man and engaged to another black man after that marriage ended, so getting a black man isn't a problem. Keeping one is. And who’s to say they were keepers. I think a lot of you need to work on your comprehension. In short, Jill Scott is stating she doesn't have a problem with interracial dating, relationships, or marriages. She is more so perplexed by interracial dating considering the race relations with African Americans and Caucasians in the past, which is merely only a few generations ago. It wasn't that long ago before whites were lynching African American men for looking at white women or white women were lying on black men and falsely accusing them of rape. STILL HAPPENS TODAY ACTUALLY! Furthermore, Jill is pondering why many successful black men fall in the arms of a white woman or non black woman instead of another successful beautiful black woman. Especially since there are MORE successful black women then they're are black men since many black men are more likely to imprisoned, killed, or never finish high school... She has no problem with interracial relationships if it's all in the sake of true love. And she's not at all saying she is the judge on who loves whom for real and who doesn't BUT is clear to see when a white women is with a black man only for what he has and not who he is, so she cannot be okay with that relationship.
@sexytranny And now we are pushing back because black men are tried of black women bashing us and nobdy is telling them the true about things. Y'all wanna hear us but don't wanna hear the truth. We the blame for failure relationship right? WRONG. All bad ending relationship is not always the man fault. We are tired of hearing "ain't no good brothers" when u got so many. You just don't have some women who want a good black man and don't know how to KEEP HIM. Men don't want DIVAS we want REAL WOMEN.
Jill Scott has issues in her life that she needs to address instead of being resentful and jealous about the happiness in the lives of others. I saw a different side of her a few years ago when a few of my friends and I went to a signing of her poetry book. She appeared to have her nose in the air and behaved as though she was doing us a favor by selling us her book instead of the other way around. Her attitude was haughty and snobbish and I can see why she would have trouble maintaining a relationship where she was not worshipped like a queen. And she was treating black women this way.
And if some of you disagree with Jill, why do you feel the need to call her fat, bitter, phony etc? Talk about throwing her album in the trash? Really?
Takes away your opinion's credibility.
The woman is entitled to her opinion and i agree plenty of black people who agree with her. Are we all fat, bitter, and phony?
the funny part about this is MOST black men are with BLACK WOMEN
get over it about the random one or two black men that date OTHER some people (black women) just dont want to see anyone happy even if they are with the person cause they are in love. the world has changed dramatically in the past 100 years. if we all live just in the past what is our future going to be
I am 4 diffrent races myself so i guess thats why i dont give a shyt your body and skin dies when you die and trust me we are all equal in gods eyes...
CARRY ON
I can definitely respect her standpoint, and I'm sure a lot of other black women understand where she is coming from whether they want to admit it or not. I don’t think she is taking issue with the concept of interracial dating/marriage. I think the issue is the fact that when many black men reach a certain socioeconomic status, they look to white/mixed women to validate their success. It wouldn’t be a big deal if these interracial situations were based on true love alone, but we all know that many of them aren’t. And we also know that black women are often excluded from the successful black man’s search for a mate. She spoke the truth and the truth is often tough to hear, but still very necessary.
i aint gon waste my time reading these comments. i love jill even more. i like how shes not afraid to speak her mind. its called freedom of speech. but her bank account gon be burning. every entertainer should know u cant publicy disrespect the white woman. look at kanye. or the half white with green eyes, look at chris brown. LOL their protected.
She also had some uncalled for snide remarks to say about Erykah Badu a while back when Miss Badu hadn't said a word about her. Jill seems difficult and argumentative and it is obvious that she is mad at the world over her failed marriage and subsequent failed engagement to the father of her son. It is time for her to look inward to discover the major cause of her unhappiness, and not to begrudge the happiness that black men find with other women. Jill is using this black man-white woman paradigm as an excuse to mask her own inner demons as to why she fails at relationships.
Thisis10
If u want to get into semantics Halle is bi-racial (and can date whom ever she wants and without getting a a back lash) and Janet dated Jermaine Dupree for yrs and married to a latino. Not a white boy. She is pointing out y sucessful bm go for white women. Halle and Janet didn't do that. Janet also dated Q-tip.
I can see where Jill is coming from because I felt this way once on a "flip side".
I was upset when I saw one of my fellow good looking, "together" Latino brothers go off an commit to a white girl but in retrospect I was 16 and immature and the Latino male in question was my ex bf who had just dumped me and then hooked up with a white girl and I was bitter, so I do have to question where here feelings truly stem from. I know she is no longer with her child's father.
I agree with jill scott, this has to be the most candid opinion I have ever heard in a long time.
The f_ck with cave dwelling white bytches, if jim crow was still in place these dog smelling wh_res would be crying out rape just like they use to do yrs ago. Then the brainwashed eurocentric black men are on here talking about love has no color. F_ck out of here, you better believe in jim crow came back into action your little becky would be screaming rape at the top of her lungs.
Civil rights activist fought for equality not stupidity. Black men are s blind that dey don't see wutz goin on. What's the difference betwen black women and white women besides we are strong willed and strong minded. Black men can't handle a strong woman that's why dey get the weak ones. I would gladly date a hispanic man or native american bt neva a white man because i respect myself more than that and my race. Let these black men do what dey want becuz sooner or later dey will learn. Black men know dey can do wuteva dey want or say wuteva dey want to dez white girls and dey won’t say nothing . Dey run ova white girls and dey kno dey can’t do dat to a black women so dey jus say forget us but screw black men, I’m feeling me a nice Hispanic man (domincan) anyway. It’s not about racism either it’s about common sense. Jill keep speaking your mind girl!
@sexytranny So you telling me that there are no strong black women. because a strong black woman is a woman that weather through any storm and still keeps a good character. Blaming ain't gonna get you nowhere. You better SUCK IT UP and keep it moving. No man wants a woman who is bitter about her ex. I had bad exes but thats on me because I CHOOSE THEM. I made a bad choice, I move on. Thats the problem holding on to that anger. Them elder old skool women don't do that. They KEEP GOD in their heart and MOVE ON. And don't think negative all the time.
At the same time African American women must be doing something wrong for their sons to be growing up idolizing white women.
Raise your sons to be candid, progressive black men that cherish black women.
Most African american women raise their daughters to be strong, however they raise their sons to be failures that idolize the white mans 500 pound rejects. Disgusting, anyway I'm going to stay away from this thread. it is about to be WW3 up in here. laterz
stfubytches
Yeah, 2 the "untrained" eye (lol) I do get mistaken for a white girl. It still doesn't change who I really am & how I feel about it, but I realized later on the real reason I felt the way I felt was because it was personal. I was bitter & hurt and immature &s that's why I felt that way.
However I will say when I was younger I wasn't the only Latina who harbored a bit of resentment if one of "our" guys dated a white chick, and the irony is we never felt that way if they dated a black chick cuz we generally all from the same types of hoods, but just the white chicks. That was the
@sexytranny LMFAO u really don't knw anything. You still got some things to learn. SMDH. LMFAO. Black men don't have no reason to be bitter to a black women. R U SERIOUS? Thats a 5 year old statement. You need help serious. You are so bias. You think one side instead of understanding both. You don't have alot of women lifting black men. THIS AIN"T THE 70s 80s. You got some but not all. You got some women who don't wanna be with a man who is a TEACHER. Some of them are DOCTORS. You got some who don't wanna be with a fellow freshmen in college because he don't have a CAR YET
I use to feel like Jill, especially since my family history includes Emmett Till, who was my father's cousin. For those who don't know who he is, google him. His name has been mentioned by so many Civil Rights activists and in certain songs. But I have gotten over the black man/white woman thing. If they haven't learned from OJ and Kobe, they will never learn. My thing is let the white women or Latinas see for themselves how black men are. Then, they will understand what we go through. But I got to say this: They don't make them like my father anymore & that's real talk!
@stfubytches
Black people speak negatively about black relationships 24/7.
So why can't I as a biracial persion speak negatively about interracial relationships?
Do you see the blatantly obvious double standard or are you such a imbecile that you can't comprehend it?
And African american women try to destroy black men every chance they get, they are no better then white cave bytches.That is why I go the route of foreign black women. Anyway later, I won't be responding anymore. Doing some important things today have fun.
I think ppl in general are way over thinking things because men period, not just Black men, usually hook up with chicks as their social network/circles dictate. Meaning that we will f uck anything that’s around us that’s easy and convenient. But to the point, the operative word is success. Cuz you’ll notice that nobody, and I mean nobody ever gives a damn when it is broke down, cant keep a job, raggedy ass Tyrone, and his trashy, morbidly over weight “Becky” roaming the aisles at Walmart. They hardly get a second look. But as soon as a BM is successful all of a sudden everyone treats him like he has an outstanding debt/obligation to the entire black race to get with a BW. Its foolish and juvenile, live ur own life
@HeavenNo, the comprehension statement was not aimed at you. Dating someone for the wrong reasons is equally bad no matter the color. A ho is a ho. I agree. Just to take a look a Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush for example, as a black woman it is so frustrating and annoying to hear or read that we hate on their relationship because he's not with a black woman or we’re jealous. No, we dislike their "relationship" because she is a media whore, that got where she is (which isn't far lol) from making a sex tape, and she doesn't do anything but move from black man to black man leaching off of them to get ahead. Best believe if he was dating Karin Steffens(SuperHead), another shameless ho, who is BLACK we would still be up in arms. Color has nothing to do with it --a ho is a ho like we established..
I see Jill's point. U guys act like it's not a problem when we have racism within out own race! Sum of these niccas worship these light skinned broads. Red bone this & that. & then u got the coons u act like being with a woman is like finding a 5 carat diamond. @Heaven ur speaking real ish 2day instead of being an azz
@sexytranny YOU Don't see alot of black men running to white women because they got one or two hurtful black women either. But you do see some. I seen black women do the same. THEY ARE DOING IT RIGHT NOW. BEEN DOING IT. I know alot of them who are doing it. WAKE UP. You stuck in the 80s. 2010 WAKE UP. LMFAo. my goodness u are such a 4 yearold. LMFAO. I'm done with you lMFAo. I wanna talk to a mature person.
This is confusing when did black men become such "hot commodities" I live down south and the only white women you typically see with black men are very overweight and/or highly uneducated and typically these men do not marry these white women anyways. When I was in college we avoided the black guys because they only wanted white women for "extracurricular activities". IRR relationships are not something to be envious of...at least from most of the examples I have seen.
@sexytranny Blk men are running away from Cornball, immature, ghetto acting, feminist women like you. Good blk men don't run from real women. I speak for all black men, I hope you marry a white man. Thats less fussy, immature, feminist cornball woman us black men got to deal with. White men take all the those type. We black men will keep the good black women with common sense.
Jill scott! You read my mind. you don't want to seem racist or seperatist but the fact still remains! There are very few white, asians or any one for that matter who go out with black women because of the brain washing this country does when comes down to idolizing white woman!! Its sad! Black woman, all woman love black men, no matter what media does to them, why can't blk woman be the same way!
Ok! Bull S H I T! I love Jill Scott I admire her work and craft but ARE YOU SERIOUS! Woman Please!
Did your so call fiance leave you for a white woman is that why you sound so pissed off?
No career minded intelligent woman cares who black men date or what they do any more...
Jill will have a better shot at love dating outside her race any way...OH! I'm sorry she so PRO-BLACK...Use to being dogged and treated like trash...Stupid! She running with the ROOTS...They would die if they found out she was dating a white man....Jill you are telling US that you rather deal with drama for LIFE
@ mazrules
The fact is how many black men you have to date before you find that true one...Sad but that is why so many women date so many men because they still search for MR. IT in black when he may not even be black at all........
It amaze me how Black Women are quick to speak about what they will not do or put up with...Brothers remain quite and continue to do them for life......Hill Harper was a good example he ran around speaking pro-black what he do...Go out and mess around with a non-black female with pride...So Fake!
Dating is a matter of personal preference. Black men and women should date the person that makes them happy regardless of race. Even though black women were raped by white slaveowners, I don’t think Halle Berry, Shar Jackson, Paula Patton, Lisa Bonet, Garcelle Beauvais, Tamyra Gray, Sanaa Lathan (?), Heather Headley, Kenya Moore, Alfre Woodard, Diana Ross, Tina Turner, Diahann Carroll, Iman, Grace Hightower (Robert Deniro’s wife), Lilly Becker (Boris Becker’s wife) and so on are somehow betraying their race because they choose to date white men.
@ heavenhollywood
Nice to hear about your interview with Jill however she need to look at her life...What is she doing wrong in her selection in Black Men...Black Men are hard and a piece of work...It amaze me how black men say they want a woman skinny, Phat azz, real hair, real nails....The entire time the majority has proven THEY ARE FAKE LIKE THAT.....
you ever heard the expression..this is chess not checkers..some of you slow minded mafukers is not even on the checkers level..you still trying to master jacks and hopscotch. the sista said it's an intrinsic feeling she gets..she doesn't even understand or fully agree with her feeling..yet you defenders/tools of white supremacy are all up in arms cuz she innately and instinctively feels a sense of rejection by her natural mate. any bm or bw that is in tune with their inner soul/spirit has..does..or will feel this way when you see the offspring of the beast paired with a hue-man being...
@Heaven.Yeah, I'm not exacly sure how Gabrielle Union and Alicia Keys have been dodging the bullets about seeing married men. Gabby maybe because she's not as famous, but I know many black women think she's a loose hoe. I've read about her personal life and she was molested at a young age, most victims of molestation tend to be loose, NOT that is an excuse for her actions. Alicia Keys..I can't take any of her songs seriously anymore and I was a HUGE fan. Still like her music but it's not the same...I'm not sure why Oprah didn't grill her when she was on the show. I find Oprah to be hypocrit but that's another story.
(cont)clarkthink in his humorous manner has the correct solution to the problems of black men and women..seperate and detach ourselves from this culture and power system that is designed to maintain oppressive control over non-whites with the tacit compliance by whites..all of whom participate in white supremacy. they have waged a war on 4 different fronts against us for the last 2500 yrs..and it hurts my heart that so many black people are willing to forgive the monstrous, diabolical, demonic creatures that continue to devise various ways to destroy the original man..how can anyone believe...
I LOVE THIS TOPIC, AND SO DOES MTO. WHY ?
BECAUSE THEN ALL THE RACIST IR HATING BLACK BYTCHES COME OUT THE WOOD WORKS AND SHOW HOW RACIST BLACK FOLKS REALLY ARE !
NOT ALL OF US BUT WAY TOO DAMN MUCH OF US.
When will u sistas start taking responsibility for why black men are running away from yall in droves and into the arms of white/hispanic/asian women ?
@ tuff-tony
No lie she has a point but just think about it...The women you just mention are made up WHORES...They made there money off of Hollywood dirt and scandal...These are not everyday women you see struggling making ends meet or whatever...They are industry whores that took the game to another level...ICE T pimps CO_CO That is why she look like trash she is making that money for him...Kim like black men so what she do brought her some boobs and a booty are you serious! So like I said they market sex nothing more........
(cont) a group of people that rob you of your language, identity and spirituality. and display such bitterness and hatred..or lack of empathy toward your own people that suffer greatly in this system. i even seen an ignorant comment that said if you don't like it go back to africa..the brother doesn't know that most of us that were enslaved were not from africa..blacks were right here in the good ole US of A before any other race of people..but the white washed mind that is dependent on his master to feed him only what he wants him to know..will have a hard time believing that..seperation is key..we will never get proper nourishment for the mind, body or soul in this power system. it's 2010..hahahaha..stupid mf'ers.
@ All_Barbies_R_Smuts
If this was the 50's or 60's black men would been hanging by a damn tree running behind black men...Due to the fact the majority of men on tv you see have status why happen they get a white woman and make her his wife...Black women are piss because its looked at like damn I bust my azz and still come out with nothing sooooooo...Its kinda like a slap in the face from the black man saying..."YOU NOT GOOD ENOUGH"...Unless the broke...
Ok THIS GET ON MY NERVES!! for a "BLACK WOMAN" to talk about a "BLACK MAN" and who he chooses to be with!!!! and especially to talk about what happened before her time or anyones time nowadays!i know what happened in the past was horrible! but that s#it is not going on now and he(the black man)has the right to choose any kind of woman he wants to be with!PERIOD the past is like your ass behind you GET OVER IT! like a white woman isnt good enough for a black man!MAN FALL OUT!LOL cause he dont want u? thats your problem man! thats whats wrong with the world today, STUPIDITY!!
Great f@#king question. More sistas need to ask themselves this.....but they wont. And brothas will date outside of their race way more until none of us are dating black women and every black kid born will be mixed with some shyte and it aint gonna be no more pure black race period !
Just my prediction. I also see the beauty of black men and women being together, but I dont think it's gonna happen and thats a damn shame. The way other races treat us, sistas cant compete cuz they are not willing to treat us how other races treat us.
I have never had a problem with IR bcus it's their life & my dad is biracial, but when I 1st saw my celeb crush Ray Allen's wife I felt this sting Jill is talking bout. He could of had just about any woman he wanted & he chose her. So my opposite must be his ideal women, that kinda ruined my fantasy relationship I had with him ha ha in my mind. & he might have chosen the girl off her character but I seriously doubt it. I made the assumption cus I've ran across 2 many BM that get ahead & refuse 2 date BW.
@ kattdaddy2
wow thank you....I understand your point....Let me break it down a bit for you...If a sister out clubing like crazy....not a good pic...She can't keep a clean house...Not good pic...She can't cook..not a good pic...She has no class or style...not a good pic...Now! That's More Of A Hoodrat type chick...
What about the woman who cook, clean, pay bills, have a career, keep her house clean cater to her man at any given moment, make his doctors appointments, bring positive energy home and around his family...Never ask for anything other than to be treated with respect...
For the people saying that they dont like to see "their" black men with white women. When did it become YOUR black men? When did it become OUR (yes im white and married to a black man) fault that a black man was attracted to us??? We cant steal a person. Maybe you should ask a black man WHY he would rather a white woman. Maybe you should rethink your ignorant comment.
Certainly, at least you seem to admit that it's happening ?
It's many reasons, but here is 1. Sistas have a prevalent, common, and persistent stereotype about them of being difficult, loud, ignorant, materialistic, and out-right bitter bytches. Sistas as a whole need to take steps to dispel this notion.
But they never do. They run around with mad attitudes and call it strength, and say im with a white woman cuz she's nice and passive and i can control her. What bullshyte....
I can go on. When you ask a brotha why he dates outside his race. This is 1 of the common reasons mentioned.
@ misshugrad
I give you answer the majority hate who they are...Some where in their life they saw how being white means being treated right...So the disown themselves and love another...
In reality they have so self love for no race other than what they see a beauty....This type of mentality they will fall hard!
*PAUSE*
I'm sorry but I'm REALLY not interested in hearing a white woman's perspective on this entire topic. Def barking up the wrong tree. You could never ever evvveerrrr understand where we are coming from. And I wouldn't expect you do.
Props for you and your black husband, congrats.
But don't come in here calling BLACK women ignorant for our feelings on this topic. You're out of your league.
This is all IF you're really white.
I agree with Jill on some points. I would never date ouside my race I LOVE my black men 2 much, but I don't care what others do. Black men are brainwashed and a lot of ppl on here think the Civil Rights Movement was all about being able to date outside your race sorry but it was'nt. It was all about BLACK POWER!!
@Heaven, You’re pretty popular today, or is this everyday :) @Katt I see this happening too especially with the glorifying of light skin and “good” hair. But how exactly does the other race act or treat you? Oh be submissive, sit back, don’t say anything, stay at home just to cook and clean, and constantly stroke your ego? NEWS FLASH, not even white women are like that anymore—it’s 2010. That’s why many white men are infatuated with Asian women because they still act is if they live in 1200BC lol. If a woman serving and worshipping you makes you feel like a man, then you weren’t a man from the jump. Just saying…
misshugrad
Good question and i will try my best to answer it truthfully.
Its just different. Less attitude, no chip on their shoulder. Sistas always wanna show strength against their man like we are their adversary or some shyte ? Like they so worried about the balance of power. They act like we owe them something.
Keep in my im generalizing. This dont apply to all sistas, but still way too many have this attitude.
@ heavenhollywood
I'm speaking from experience and what I hear other black women speak about daily.....The majority of females I spoken with would say damn I gave him my all and he still dog me out....Ok!
I say do you love you and recognize trash coming when you see it...Period!
I hear black men dog out black women names such as B I T C H E S, Whores, Welfare, Baby Makers...Just pure degrading....I heard this white guy say to me damn why yall even date black men because of how nasty and disrespectful they are....
Yes I do agree you should not depend on anybody other than yourself
IM SORRY DAT JILL WANTS 2 BE STUCK INDA PREVIOUS CENTURY ME PERSONALLY I DONT WANNA GO BACK 2 AN ERA OF SEGREGATION AND JIM CROW IM 010 NOT 1910 JILL NEED 2 GET WIT DIS ERA YES RACISM AND PREJUDICE STILL EXISTS BUT ATLEASE ITS BETTA THAN WHAT IS WAS ID RATHER LIVE IN DIS ERA THAN DAT ERA AND BLACKS RACISM AINT OK WHEN YALL DOIT SO STOP ACTIN LIKE IT IS 2 WRONGS DONT MAKE IT RIGHT BUT IT MAKE IT EVEN HAHA.
@kattdaddy2:
You seem like a thinking individual.
You really can't be THAT judgmental about black women. Because that would include all the black women in your family, that you yourself came from.
There are so many of us who outrun that stereotype.
No, we are not gonna be your lapdogs, if that's what you want.
But I'm really not hearing much from you in terms of reasons.
Also, for EVERYONE raving on about blacks being slaves and you had it hard...blah blah blah. First off, you were not slaves. Your ancestors were. LONG LONG ago. Also, before you start saying whites were treated better, you should brush up on your history. Europeans (which are WHITE) were slaves to the Muslims from 1530-1780. There were about 1-1.25 million who were captured and forced to work in north Africa. So we should be pissed too right. Well we are not because it was LOOOOONG ago. Times have changed and so should you. If you keep thinking like this our humanity will never evolve.
ive dated black an white women so id rather just have a black women an i found one who likes me for me an MTO YOU B!TCH A$$ MOTHERF/_/CKERS BETTER APPROVE MY PICTURE I SEE BIG OLD ASSES ON HERE Y CANT I HAVE A PIC OF ME AN THE BIG ASS IN MY PIC I THINK YOUR HATIN SO APPROVE IT....What YOU SENDING ME IN A MESSAGE BASICALLY IS I CANT BE WHITE AN HAVE A BIG BLACK ASS BY MY FACE???????????????? DAS FOOKED UP
Ezra is on point. I dated a white woman 1 time and will never do it again. That love was False and Deep in my heart I knew it. I have a sister now and I feel whole.When I dated my white ex I could feel the exile feeling. I felt alone even though She was so supportive. I just didnt feel Gods presence.
Regardless if we agree or disagree, she opened up and spoke her inner thoughts which many of us struggle with. If this is how she feel, then who's to say 'get over it'? We all have things in our own world botherin' us and it is healthy to express those emotions weather good or bad. Even though I'm kinda burnt out on this subject, I respect and admire the way she elegantly expressed herself instead of comin' off as bitter, angry, and disrespectful toward the opposite sex. If more of us were as expressive as Jill, we would have a better understandin' of each other.
@juslisenk AND THANK YOU You took THE WORDS RIGHT OUT OF MY MOUTH MAN......its 2010 not 1800's no more....time to move along an let it go every race been slaved like jews dont complain a lot about being killed 6million of them they just never 4got..but we all been slaves... Look towards the future not reminisce on the past
clarkthink says, And maybe you should read the memo,.....honky hoe!!
ATTENTION!! ATTENTION!! ALL WHITE PEOPLE LEAVE MTO IMMEDIATELY!! PLEASE REPORT TO HONKY.COM!! OR, CR@CKER.NET!!
.....get to steppin'!!!
THIS IS A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT!! ---------------
WOW!! You resort to name calling. How mature of you. I will leave that alone and let you wallow in your self pity.
I'm on team Jill Scott, what she had the guts to say most bw are thinking when a see a sharp dress nice look brotha w/a becky on his arm. I have to agree with alot of these sista comments blk men always making up excuses for only dating white women. When I ask a brotha why he only date white women he always want to put the sista down making negative comments, like a sista talk to much or always got her hand out. One thing you fail to c brotha's blk women have & always will have your back. What I'm saying has nothing to do w/ being a racist just stating the facts brotha's.
In a way, I'm starting to see how the media is doing a part by shaping the minds of many African Americans. More and more of us are starting to view each other in a negative light because we constantly embrace what the media projects. And the thing is, all races has relationship issues but the media chooses to focus on BW & BM a lot more. Some of us need to turn off the TV and start creatin' our own reality and stop livin' in the reality of television. There are plenty of successful BW & BM who are together but the media rarely focus on this because it doesn't want too.
@missugrad
Wether or not you want my opinion you read it. And im sorry, what will i not understand about what you go through??????? Did any of my family enslave you and treat you wrong??? We are all GODS children so we all come from the same mother and father. (wether some people want to believe it or not) Yes im really white. Why would i say i was if i wasnt. Dont disregard someones opinion because you dont like the color of their skin. Grow up. Im sure half the people on here are white, they just dont say so. So you could be agreeing with a white person.
LOve has NO COLOR! WHat I do not agree with is.... when Black Males deal with black women their whole lives; they date them, have kids from them etc. As soon as they make it big and start to make money, they start to date white women. It makes you think??!?! Are they dating white women because they really like them, or are they dating white women because a lot of other wealthy black males are doing so?
I FEEL LIKE THIS:
IN NO WAY SHAPE OR FORM AM I RACIST BUT I "DO" FEEL LIKE RACES SHOULD NOT PROCREATE ( NOTHING AGAINST BI-RACIAL KIDS AT ALL I HAVE A FRIEND THAT HAS MIXED KIDS I JUST PERSONALLY DON'T BELIEVE IN IT) SIMPLY BECAUSE IF GOD WANTED US TO BE ONE COLOR HE WOULD HAVE MADE US THAT WAY IN THE BEGINING. WE ARE DIVERSE FOR A REASON.
Jill has a right to her own opinion. I don't care about the swirls. I like all guys, black, white, spanish, anyone who will make me happy bcuz that's all that matters. This reminds me of the light vs. dark skinned thing 4 some reason w/ ppl getting all bent outta shape when ppl say their preference. You like who you like. Sometimes it hurts bcuz some ppl can be ignorant about it but hey, that's life.
@samanya: I've read his comments numerous times before this particular topic so I have my reasons as to why I enjoy reading his comments.. Besides,why are you so concerned with what I do? Plus,where are you getting these ideas that I'm desperate? This is the internet so relax.I' not here to make friends,land a date or what not. No need for the attitude.
@ misshugrad
(You really can't be THAT judgmental about black women. Because that would include all the black women in your family, that you yourself came from.)
I said some sistas, not all, but still way too damn many this applies too.
(There are so many of us who outrun that stereotype.)
Well not enough of u cuz the stereotype persists.
@kattdaddy2:
While I DEF do not agree with your admitted generalizations about us, I have had frank conversations with my boyfriend about what it is many black men may see in other women.
Many may take this as sexist, but he did mention sometimes black women need to fall back a little. So there is an element of understanding how the mind of a man operates.
I'm not into cowtowing, but I do understand the black male ego is a fascinating thing.
However, I think discussion, honesty, & openness is better than writing black women off.
Lets learn about and support eachother.
Cont
(No, we are not gonna be your lapdogs, if that's what you want.)
Again, u are proving my point about this adversarial attitude. Were not your enemy to be defeated or overcome.
(But I'm really not hearing much from you in terms of reasons.)
I gave you a clear one. (Sistas have a prevalent, common, and persistent stereotype about them of being difficult, loud, ignorant, materialistic, and out-right bitter bytches.)
@heaven. MTO loves to race baiting, I'm surprised by the hate I read in here. Kind of scary makes me wonder what type of people I'm rubbing shoulders with at the grocery store, mall, and at the gym. But a the end of the day like my parents always told me. date and marry whoever loves and respect you and treats you the way you deserved to be treated.
@juslisenk:
Sorry hun but we are DEF on two different pages.
You see, number one I'm not into following the religion that YOUR ancestors have proclaimed as the "gospel" and shoved down MY people's throats. So you can save all that "we are all god's children" jargon for a different black woman.
Again - you really have no place calling black women who share Jill's sentiments ignorant.
Although you have married a black man, you STILL have not attempted to understand OUR people. You think you have a black card now or something? lmao. You my dear are out of your league.
@ Tastysis
I never said i was comparing anything. I am just stating the fact that whites were slaves as well, we just dont dwell on the fact. Just because there were MORE black slaves makes it worse for them??? You also can not compare. We remember and we move on. As should you. Its not typical western thinking, its fact. People will always disagree with this subject and someone will always have something to say, so im done.
@juslilenk U feeling real bold behind the computer screen. That's like telling the Jews 2 4get about the holocoust cus it was ur ancestors & it doesn't matter anymore. Ur probaly just another out of shape white thrash ho u gets passed up by white men so u have 2 settle 4 brothas. Why r u over hear anyways? I'm never on white blogs cus I don't give a fuc about what y'all doing. Bitch gots black girl envy ha, ha!
I understand her perspective. I can understand how it can feel like betrayal, but understand this, MOST Black men WANT to be with a Black woman, some of them have hang ups and so do a lot of black women and that's the bottom line. Secondly IR dating does not and will not eradicate racism and those who think so will surely be awoken by an abrasive experience. Third, BW and BM need to elevate EACH other, I look at some of these comments on here from these brothas and many are pretexts and tenuous justifications. We need to be educated and we need to go back to the way we used to love each other
@social studies: You must be one of these bloggers with multiple sns ..I mean,what have I've done to you for you to continue stalking me or picking on me on certain threads? This is just the internet & most likely will never meet so just cut it out already. Are you a teenager or something? I don't get your little e-attacks or wanting to e-beef with another cyber being. It's not that serious @ all.
this white brawd said..."Im sure half the people on here are white, they just dont say so. So you could be agreeing with a white person."
got damn..white people can't survive without us..they will follow us to the ends of the earth and the ends of the world-wide web..i bet if black folks went to venus 2morrow..whiteys will be there on monday..talkin bout..what ya'll doing up here..can't have nothing 4 ourselves..got damn!
@ misshugrad
I find it facinating that when brothas repeatedly tell sistas why we date outside our race, sistas are resistant to the answers and refuse to accept them. They refuse to accept that they are indeed the root cause for why IRR is so prevalent among brothas. Again, you see falling back as weakness and its not. This is sistas confusing attitude with strength.
@kattdaddy2:
Maybe we're misinterpreting each other between these posts...but I'm really not trying to be adversarial, and I get your generalizations.
Anyway, as you said, I really don't think you have a problem with us on a whole. At least not as much as I though u did from your first comment...I take it as you just voicing some honest feelings.
& biatch Im sure u have heard of the phrase. Don't judge me until u have walked n my moccasins. My mother grew up around the time their were separate water fountains. This was not all that long ago . Look at the ish that's happening in Washington since the healthcare bill has passed. Quit acting like racism is dead.
Oh no Jill, why??? Look whatcha started..LOL. But she's very brave to come out and say all this and I can tell that she's just speaking her true feelings which is also what most BW feel, but some are understandably scared to speak on this issue because they don't wanna ruffle any feathers, mostly those that are in IR's. Everyone has their own opinion about this issue, but it becomes frustrating when the hateful arguements start back and forth between BM & BW. It gets hard to read what you guys say sometimes because it's just so awful that all I can do is SMH...
@kattdaddy2: but you have to admit that some IRR are caused by black men's issues (status for example) It can't just be black women's faults.
We won't get anywhere if we keep blaming each other. It helps to understand what ticks both sides off. And there is plenty that black men do to tick off black women.
@miss I NEVER said black women were ignorant so you can stop that right there. I said a COMMENT was ignorant. And what is a "black card". I dont have to explain to you why i married a black man.
I believe that everyone is allowed their opinion. Im not writing anyone off. How am i out of my league?? What does that even mean. Because i dont share your skin color i could never understand?? Why dont you explain it to me then. Im sure you could sum it all up. But dont, im done with this subject because we could go on and on and on. Have a good day!
Okay wtf.it is 2010. Slavery ended so damn long ago tht the only time it is talkd about is history class or pple who cnt except reality. Anyways back thn while all that mess was hapnin not all white woman stayed with white men. Lol n thts a fact lk @ d actors, singers or jst rgular ppl tht r well ovr 60 yrs old or deceased n wld b 100 or oldr by nw tht wre or r mixd blck & whte. But as 4 slavery wtf pple stp tlkin abt d fck'n stne age type ish, thts hw bullshyt strts. D only way 4 racism 2 evr stp is 2 STOP tlkin abt it. I feel bad 4 any child born into a racist family.
@ misshugrad
Not adversarial with me, adversarial in your relationships with black men. Your insistence that your not gonna be anybodys lapdog, and how u not gonna fallback. Other races dont feel that they have to worry about a brotha taking advantage of them in someway. Its like u had to tell me that to protect yourself. AKA defensive posturing. I hope i was clear
@ ChasityLove I was not making a joke, I simply repeated what one of the brothers posted. Now I think the attitudes comes from single parent homes where the black father is absent in body, but the mother continues to talk about him negatively. That behavior has been passed to the mothers of today who have the I don't need a man attitude. But we all know it takes two to have a productive well balanced household.
@ misshugrad
Oh believe me, i love sistas. I love women period. I dont use race or color to determine who i like, as some folks on here do. See, the thing with stereotypes, they dont apply to every entire member of a group, but still way too many, enough to re-enforce the stereotype. And yes, so e black men IR date because they are weak and dont wanna deal with a sista because they are perceived as difficult, and there is some truth to that for some people.
@kattdaddy2:
But you can understand why it's in our blood and upbringing to carry ourselves differently than women of other races. We are a different people and face different .
But this is sounding like black women are less lady-like or something, and there are loud and aggressive white women.
We might be less submissive, but there are positive "attributes" that black women have that other races do not.
Just look at Tiger. It seems like he was bored with his wife, who may at one time have been at the speed that you prefer and want us to operate at.
Bottom line, in my personal experience, other races are indeed easier to deal with. Ive dated nice passive sistas, and difficult white girls, but the totality of my personal experience with women in general is the same. I came across more sistas with attitude than other races, and this is alot of other peoples experience too. Again, this collage of separate peoples experiences is what creates the perceived stereotypes.
@mishugrad No one wants to see a black woman free. Men should be sensitive to a black woman's need to be in control, hell black women were beaten into submission and muted since slavery. A black woman shouldn't have to be submissive to have any man or wealth, that's how white girls are raised. Submission only should be given to a deserving man. But be honest, what man is worthy of a submissive wife? U see how submisive women are treated. Keep ur head up, don't put head down for anyone anymore or u want be nothing but propety to a man and something to be told what to do and how to do it.
GTFOH All you chicks in here talking about ain't enough good black men, or good men at all. Get over yourselves...some of ya'll find happiness shopping, some of ya'll find happiness in getting your hair done, or nails or whatever..so who the heck are you to bash anyone else for finding happiness as they see fit.
Jill Scott's career owes alot to them same white women she's now trying to diss...let's see how well her next album does. ya'll jumped down john mayer's throat when he voiced his opinion...ya'll should be smart and non hypocritical and do the same in this case.
Seriously!!
Well, I am glad to hear that after all that, you at least still have love and affection for black women. In the end, that's really all that matters to me and a lot of black women. I think we expect from you all (black men) the most, because the truth is we won't get it much from any other races of men. (Not that we need it from them, but what women doesn't want to feel appreciated?) So, we look to black men for that.
Gotta go, but it's been a great discussion w/u.
